Thursday, April 8, 2010

Writer's Workshop

I havene't participated in Mama Kat's workshop in awhile, so I thought I would give that a try today.

Mama's Losin' It

I am going to try to tackle the first prompt:

Baby fever is in the air. Describe what you would do differently as a first time mom.

First off I was a first time Mom twice.  What do I mean by that?  Well I have 2 children, 16 months apart, and they couldn't be more different.  For all you new Moms that have one child, the second one may be  totally different, and you think you are going to "fix" everything with the second one, and it's like you are starting all over and have never even had a child!

With my first child, my son D-Ro, I took off about 4 months of work after he was born.  I really enjoyed that time with him.  And when it was time to go back to work, I didn't want to go.  There was really no reason that I decided to take 4 months off as opposed to 6, 8, or even 12.  The company where I worked at the time, would have allowed up to a year off.   It was a wonderful time with my son.  He was a cuddly little boy, and I loved holding him.  Looking back I would have held him even more.  And I was so upset when it was time to go back to work.  That first day was so difficult!

So this was something I was going to "fix" with the second one.  I was going to increase my time off and I was going to hold the second one all the time.  NOT!  I did decide to take 6 months off with our second, but honestly after about 2 weeks at home with BOTH of them, I called my husband and told him to get ready to take leave, because there was no way I could handle 6 months of this!  Everything was totally different.  First of all, the little girl didn't want to be held.  EVER.  Let me re-phrase, she didn't want to be held by me!  She loved it when Daddy or Grandma held her.  Just not me!  Maybe she could sense the complete mental breakdown I was going through on the inside - I don't know. 

She was also a puker.  Constantly!  At first, she seemed so uncomfortable - she would just cry and pull her little legs up - we new something wasn't quite right.  We finally changed her formula to Alimentum which is a hypoallergenic formula, and it was like flipping a switch.  The discomfort appeared to go away.  She still puked non-stop, but she didn't appear to be in any pain.  So this was wonderful, and I remember thinking that now we would be able to go out and  go for walks and take her brother to the park.  NOT!  She started sleeping for approximately 20 hours per day!   Ok - this sounds like a dream right?  It really wasn't - I was a prisoner in our house.  She wouldn't sleep anywhere but her bed.  When I did go back to work, our babysitter was just astounded at how long she slept.  She slept 6 out of the 8 hours she was there!  Then we would get home and she would want to go to bed at around 5:30 or 6 pm - for the entire night.  We never saw this child!  

With my son, I worried all the time.  I was on the phone with the pediatrician 2 or 3 times a week, about any little thing.  I referred to him as Dr. Hottie.  Thank goodness he was so wonderful!  So I was going to "fix" this too.  NOT!  With our daughter everything was different, and I was still on the phone with Dr. Hottie 2 or 3 times a week!   How did that happen - I had already been through one infant - why did it seem like I learned NOTHING??

With my son, I hated the binky!  I hated it, and he loved it!  Our babysitter helped wean him off of the binky at about 10 months.  With my daughter, I was going to "fix" that.  I took the binky away at about 3 months.  The result - she started sucking her index and middle finger, upside down.  She still does this today at night!  She is 7!  I really fixed it all right!

I think the morale of this story is that no matter what you do as a Mom, you think you should do something differently.  But really, whatever you are doing is right for the situation.  In the end it all works out!   We all need to trust our maternal instincts a little more.  Our kids will love us and never know the difference anyway!


paige said...

I have a friend who has 3 kids and her first and second are completely different. It's so interesting how you just never know. I can't wait to see how I mess my kids up one day!

Visiting from Mama Kat's.

Christy, the Mum said...

My son had a milk allergy as well, AND he would sleep hours (but only in his crib). The first six months were difficult. I have a laundry list of changes to make for the next one, but like you said, you never know what your next child will be like.

Popped in from Mama Kat's.

Law Momma said...

I love it. And now I'm terrified to go through all this again! :) Can I put you on speed dial? Or speed email?

Life with Kaishon said...

This post was awesome! And so dead on! You never know what each child will be like. I know they are both going to turn out perfectly : ). We have 2 little babies in our family right now, and it is incredible how different each kid is. So different. And so wonderful too : ) I love babies!

hotpants™ said...

This post is so true. My kids couldn't be more different. It's hilarious.