A Big Pot Of Crazy

9 year old little girl drama...

2011-06-17T13:12:00.000-07:00

El Director and I have hired a college student to keep an eye on our kids during the day while we are at work... This SHOULD be an easy job. However we have 4 very independent, sometimes loud, sometimes ornery, always mischievous children. So what SHOULD be an easy job, isn't always so easy.

Take for instance this past Wednesday... Everyone was actually getting along in the morning after a stressful moment the night before when we couldn't find K-Lo's Bear Blankie... Fortunately AWA located the Bear Blankie early Wednesday morning, so everyone was happy... until they went to the pool...

Let me give a little background... A few months ago, I took AWA to a birthday party for her "friend". Let's just call this friend "McGuire". Actually, I am not sure how these two became friends or why AWA still considers this girl her friend. Their personalities just don't seem to agree. AWA is so outgoing, talkative, confident... except when she is around McGuire. When she is with McGuire she is submissive, and she doesn't stick up for herself. McGuire seems to like to be the center of attention. There have been other subtle incidences with her. So at this point I just don't encourage the relationship.

This particular birthday party was held at an arcade type of place - where the kids get tickets when they play games. And they collect these tickets to buy prizes. I left the party for a short time to run an errand, and when I came back, AWA was not happy. She had given all of her tickets to McGuire because McGuire told her that the tickets were hers since it was her birthday. So AWA didn't have any tickets left and could get any prizes... None of the other kids gave their tickets to McGuire. AWA was pretty upset, and really just wanted to leave. So we did.

K-Lo feels very protective of AWA... And K-Lo knew about this incident and has been wanting to have words with McGuire for some time. (Are you keeping up here - 8/9 year old little girl drama is worse than a soap opera!)

Fast forward to this week... All of the kids are at the pool, and who shows up... McGuire! I really thought the girls had forgotten about all of this (I had forgotten about all of this). No such luck! K-Lo decided to tell McGuire a thing or two about her behavior and that she should NOT treat AWA that way. And apparently in the end, McGuire left crying. K-Lo did apologize to McGuire before they left the pool.

I came home a little later - get mobbed by the girls - hear this entire story, and am warned that "McGuire's Mom might call you." Alright, this isn't the first time that K-Lo's brutal honesty has resulted in a parent contacting me!

So honestly, how do I feel about that? Not very upset! My daughter routinely stands up to bullies! She does not like to see people getting picked on. She is not intimidated by many people, and least of all by a 9 year old little girl. I am so proud that she is willing to call people out on their behavior! But I think my hair is turning gray at an exponential rate!

In true Picksburgh fashion...

2011-05-17T08:24:00.000-07:00

We got married this weekend at the Heinz History Center, which is absolutely the most fabulous museum in Pittsburgh! It is all Pittsburgh, all the time! We LOVE it! El Director and I love it! All four kids love it!

On a bit of a tangent, I must confess that one of my favorite things in Pittsburgh is at the airport... When you go up the escalator after the tram... on your way to the sky mall and the terminals... there are 2 statues. One of these statues is George Washington - the founder of our country. The other statue is of Franco Harris - the receiver of the immaculate reception.

I think it is so soooooo funny that we place these 2 "legends" side by side. There is just something very comical about this to me. There is a similar statue of Franco Harris at the Heinz History Center...

And I am raising 4 little Picksburghers... So in true Picksburgh fashion, we had to get a picture of the 4 kiddles with Franco...

I love this picture! Look at those faces! They had a great time at the wedding and the reception!

A quick follow-up...

2011-05-16T15:09:00.000-07:00

Well, well, well... apparently I have touched a nerve. I must say that those of you who know me know that the idea of stirring up controversy is actually kind of fun for me!   Just to be clear... this blog is MY outlet... I reserved my comments for a very long time on this blog, but no more. What I write here are my un-edited thoughts.

That being said, I would like to address some of your comments personally... Oh - wait a minute - I can't reply to you personally because you don't have the balls to leave your email address! Cyberspace is a wonderful thing isn't it... You can talk all kinds of trash, and not be held accountable. How nice for you! So I guess I will address you here so that everyone can read what I want to say to you...

Do not pretend to know me, my husband, my step-children, or my children on the basis of one blog post. I was not even specific about the incident on Mother's Day... NONE of you even know any of the details. But to clear up any ambiguity, my husband was also shell-shocked and not pleased about what happened.

I never, EVER said that I was trying to erase the memory of my step-children's mother. In fact, you may be surprised to know that I have very loving and in-depth conversations with my step-daughters about their mother - sometimes more in-depth conversations with them than their father because they are very comfortable talking to me about her. The children did not know that I was upset on Mother's Day - I would never make them feel uncomfortable or self-conscious about talking about their mother.

Would you be surprised to know we have a tree in the backyard to memorialize her, and that tree will be uprooted and moved to our new home so that we can have the memorial at our new family home.  Would you be surprised to know that we went to that tree on their mother's birthday and each said something to her? Even me - the wicked evil step-mother!

I love comments! LOVE THEM! I love hearing from people on this blog, and I have made many friends through this blog. But for those of you who have never read my blog before, or don't know me personally, DO NOT presume to know my situation.  And if you do not have the testicular fortitude to leave an email address so that I can contact you personally, then don't bother commenting!

I will continue to vent on this blog! And I welcome your responses to my rants!

I am annoyed!

2011-05-11T09:51:00.000-07:00

This post is deeper than most of my posts... there are just some things I need to express...

I am marrying a widower with 2 little girls. The entire situation presents a very interesting dynamic.

El Director lost his first wife; the girls lost their mother. They mourn that loss.

I lost my first husband, though not because of death. And my children lost their intact family. We mourn that loss.

We all will continue to mourn our individual losses. However, we are all moving forward as a family. and WE ARE HAPPY! Can you believe it? Yes - we are all happy to be together!

I do not expect my new stepchildren to forget their mother. However, I need to point out that I am the one who will raise them... I am the one who will wipe their tears; hold them when they are sick; attend their school functions; cheer them on at their soccer games. I am the one who has embraced these little girls as if they are my own to try to make them feel whole again... to make them feel the unconditional love of a Mom...

There are some things that annoy me greatly and I have no other outlet for them...

I am annoyed when Mother's Day is hijacked. I am annoyed when there are ceremonies or remembrances occurring and I am not included. In fact, not only am I not included, I am not even told about these events... At the end of the day - I became the second best Mom. There are 365 days in the year - pick any other day to make me the second best Mom... Incidentally, I think next year we are eliminating Mother's Day from our family calendar.

I am very annoyed when people try to prolong the mourning. Is that insensitive?? Well - I don't care! I wish people would stop trying to find new and innovative ways to remember El Directors first wife. Otherwise I may have to find new and innovative ways to commemorate my first husband as well.

Do not feel sorry for El Director and my step-daughters. This kind of goes along with prolonging the mourning... Is it so far-fetched to believe that El Director could actually be happy with anyone than his first wife??

No - we are not going to have any kind of dedication to El Directors first wife at our wedding. The same way we will not be having any kind of dedication to my first husband.

Enough venting for now... I reserve the right to add more later.

Happy Mother's Day!

2011-05-08T05:01:00.000-07:00

This year, I am celebrating Mother's Day with El Director and our 4 kiddles. El Director's girls (AHA and AWA) have completely embraced me as a Mom - and it feels awesome! These 2 sweet little girls lost their mother almost 2 years ago. And there is something inside of me that compels me to help them feel whole again.

I am working so hard to make sure D-Ro, K-Lo, AHA, and AWA feel a mother's love every single day! Each of them touches my heart in their own special way. Some thoughts off the top of my head...

I love when my son, who is 10 just comes up to me out of nowhere and hugs me and tells me he loves me. He is so loving and sweet. He is a very reserved little boy with his feelings. But I know in my heart how much he loves his Mom!
I love K-Lo's sense of humor... She has always been very wise beyond her years, and she has a very mature sense of humor. She makes me laugh every. single. day.
I love in the morning when AWA gets up with me (she is an early bird like me) and she looks at me and says "Coffee?" And she snuggles up with me on the couch under an afghan and we watch Good Morning America.
I love how AHA waits until the other kids are distracted with something, and she sneaks up to me and gives me a big bear hug.

They are 4 different people.... All smart, funny, loving, and kind. And all of them also have their own special way of pushing me to the edge of sanity - like when they leave garbage all over the inside of my van; sing top 40 songs like "What the Hell" at the top of their lungs; or call my every expanding ass "Nancy."

But I feel so lucky to have the opportunity to be a Mom to all of these kids. They are all teaching me to be a better person and they are teaching me how unconditional love feels. So today I will celebrate the gift of 4 children that has been given to me.

Rainbow Cake....

2011-04-26T11:58:00.000-07:00

My daughter decided we should make this cake for Easter:

Wow! It never occurred to me to make a cake like this before; a little too extravagant for my simple mind. So we set out to make this cake.

Ok - so it didn't turn out exactly like the photo, but it tasted great! We have decided this is our new Easter tradition.

Post It Note Tuesday...

2011-04-12T12:59:00.000-07:00

Its Post It Note Tuesday!!!!!
My thoughts for the day...

Size does matter?

2011-02-17T12:35:00.000-08:00

So I snore... Well that is what I am told anyway... For a long time I was convinced that Satan and Lucifer were conspiring against me, and just pretending that I snore in an effort to see if they could drive me further into insanity. Then they got El Director on board, and he told me I snored.

One night I got the bright idea that I would record myself on my iPhone all night long to catch myself snoring. What happened instead is that I think I crashed my iPhone... I am not sure if the 7 hour 47 minute recording had anything to do with it - I just know that right after that recording, the iPhone suffered a horrible death. I never got to listen to that recording, so I still have never heard myself actually snore. I am just taking the word of some very questionable characters!

I do know that I wake up every. single. night. And I am starting to think that I actually wake myself up snoring. So El Director had a bright idea that I should try some nose strips, and he happen to have some for me to try - they were Target brand. And I must report that the first night I wore the nose strip, I slept soundly all night long, for the first time in as long as I can remember. I tried the Target nose strip a second night, and sure enough, I slept great!

So I stopped at the Rite Aid one evening between running to soccer and swimming and I bought a box of nose strips - they were Rite Aid brand. And that night, I used one. But by the next morning, the strip was missing - I still have not located it. My son did however reported that I did not snore.

The next night, I used another Rite Aid Strip, but I woke up about 4:00 am and tossed and turned after that. Eventually that strip started lifting up around 5:00 or so. My daughter wore one of the nose strips that night too (she does have a little snoring problem occasionally).

So that morning, after we were all awake, I said to K-Lo, "I wonder if my nose is too big for the strip??" Then I went downstairs to get her breakfast ready.

While I am getting her some toast, she is yelling down from my bedroom, "Size does matter Mom!" Um - WHAT??? She yelled that to me again. I seriously had no idea WHAT the child was talking about.

I went back upstairs, and she is sitting on my bed reading the box for the nose strips, and it does say on the box that some people require a medium-large nose strip, and I was only using the medium strips.

Hmph! So basically, my nose is too big for the medium strips! Apparently size does matter in more ways than one!

Onto the Next Chapter...

2011-01-24T05:37:00.000-08:00

Guess what?? I am sooo happy! I have been moping around on this blog for the past several months. But during that time, when I wasn't sulking about the Enginerd, a funny thing happened... I started seeing someone very seriously. This is someone that I have known for sometime, but really only as friends. I don't have a good alter-ego name for him, so I am going to call him El Director.

During the summer when I was going through a very rough time, El Director was really a great friend. My family is not in the area, and I had just started a new job... With all of the other things going on in my life, I felt very alone. And the relationship began to progress...

He has 2 children and they get along great with my kids... Actually his oldest daughter is the same age as my daughter - so there is little competition there because as you all know little girls are MEAN! His younger daughter idolizes my son - they are so cute... She loves to play XBox with him, and he is so happy to have a willing opponent!

A few weekends ago, we went to the Heinz History Center in Pittsburgh with all 4 kids. This is truly my favorite museum in Pittsburgh! It is ALL Pittsburgh! And soooo cool! We hadn't taken the kids there before, so this was their first visit, and they all seemed to really enjoy it.

The museum was more crowded than normal because of a Vatican Exhibit, and El Director was getting annoyed. After we went through the entire museum, I could tell it was time to go - the kids were getting hungry; there was a lot of noise with all of the people; El Director looked exasperated! So we were all standing together talking about the museum, and El Director asked the kids what they thought... They all said they really liked the museum. Then El Director asked them what they thought about having a wedding at the museum, and they thought that would be a great place for a wedding. Then he turned to me and asked me if I would like to have our wedding at the museum!!! And he got out a little blue box, and showed all of the kids our wedding rings.

I am not normally an emotional person, but I began to tear up. The kids were so happy. El Director and I are so happy!

I know alot of you are thinking that I have gone completely nuts! Maybe I have... Whatever... I am happy! I am crazy in love! I am onto the next chapter now...

What did I agree to????

2011-01-23T06:39:00.000-08:00

Ok - so my sister has been diagnosed with Graves Disease, and one of the results of that disease is that her thyroid is running at max speed! At Christmastime, she was eating about 3000 calories a day just to maintain her weight. Sounds all good, right? Wrong - when the thyroid is maxed out like that, it can have a very bad effect on her heart.

So she decided to have a radioactive iodine treatment on her thyroid. After the treatment, she stayed in a hotel for a few days so she wouldn't expose my little nephew to any radiation. I called her the first night she was stuck in the hotel, and we discussed the effects of the iodine treatment, and what happens next...

So she started talking about having more kids, and what would happen if she couldn't have any more and this thyroid thing messes everything up... blah blah blah... But I THINK I agreed to be a surrogate for her! Really?? Did I really agree to that?? I didn't even hesitate, which is really only an indication that I had been drinking waaaaay to much! Couldn't I just give her my kidney or my thyroid??

Then I started thinking about it alittle more - maybe it wouldn't be so bad... I mean, I had really easy pregnancies both times... With my second, I completely fell off the wagon, and ate everything in sight! I ate chocolate icing right from the can every. single. day. Truth be told, I still do that on a lot of days, but when I was pregnant, I had no guilt!

In fact, the worst part about being pregnant for me was after the babies were born... the lack of sleep; the stress of trying to get the belly button to heal; worrying that they weren't getting enough to eat; worrying that I was overfeeding them; I could go on and on...

I wouldn't have to deal with any of that stuff. The kid would probably roll right out, because lets face it, that road has been paved - I suspect it wouldn't take much more than a sneeze to get it out. And I already need some kind of surgery to get my stomach back anyway, so there is really no more damage that can be done in that area...

Then I remembered the hormonal shifts my body endured after the babies were born... my hair all fell out and what little was left went completely straight... I broke out in severe hives all over my body for months... Hmmmm - maybe a kidney donation would be easier...

Second Best...

2010-12-23T04:16:00.000-08:00

Well the holidays are upon us... I have never liked them - for as long as I can remember I have disliked Christmas time. The shopping, decorating, wrapping gifts... Bah Humbug!

This year will be the first Christmas I spend without the Enginerd... This is also the first Christmas where my kids no longer believe in Santa, so it is kind of a double whammy. It will be the first Christmas morning that I wake up and my kids aren't with me - they are coming home at noon on Christmas Day. I feel like I am second best... in many ways.

When I was married, what I wanted always came second to the Enginerd's mother... On Christmas Eve, we always, ALWAYS went to his mother's. Even when we lived in Ohio and had 2 babies - we drove to his mother's for Christmas Eve. In my mind, it was a small price to pay so that we could stay home on Christmas day. Arguing about it was futile. It was like that for every. single. holiday. I became numb and accustomed to being second place.

As a child, I went back and forth between my parents homes though they were many more miles apart than the Enginerd and me. But I swore to myself that I would never do that to my kids.... and here I am...

At this moment, I feel very alone and it is tearing me up. I dragged myself out of bed this morning for work... I am hoping I can be distracted there for a few hours...

I wish I had them Christmas Eve and Christmas morning... I wish I didn't have to share them... I wish I didn't feel so alone right now... I wish I didn't feel like second best...

The next chapter begins...

2010-11-23T09:20:00.000-08:00

The divorce is final. During this whole thing, I tried not to malign the Enginerd. Though there were multiple times he said very nasty things about me. I chose to mourn the ending of my marriage privately. Even now, for those of you who know me in person, I will not speak negatively about the Enginerd. Our issues were private, and really nobody else's business.

But here on my blog, I intend to speak out. We have been living separately for the past several months. A lot of that time is vague - I don't remember much of the summer - my mind must be blocking it out. I am sure there are things that I will miss about the Enginerd, but there are also many MANY things I will not miss.

In no particular order (please try to follow all of my double negatives):

I will not miss never being able to talk about anything - how I was feeling, my sadness, the fact that the hallway needed painting for 2 years... Any time I wanted to talk about something, I was told that "all I do is bitch".
I will not miss the bickering. We bickered non-stop, and it was exhausting.
I will not miss crying myself to sleep because my husband slept on the couch every. single. night.
I will not miss trying to talk to the Enginerd about how unhappy I was and being told that I just need to increase my medication.
I will not miss staying at work late so that I didn't have to come home and deal with the passive aggression.
I will not miss my kids asking me why their Dad is in a bad mood all the time.
I will not miss asking him to go to therapy with me and being told that I am the problem... "We" don't need therapy.
I will not miss never feeling beautiful or attractive.
I will not miss feeling alone all the time.
I will not miss everyone thinking we had a perfect marriage.
I will not miss all of the physical symptoms of stress that have magically disappeared - my severe lower back pain; the TMJ pain that would make my jaw lock up.
I will not miss having my feelings of self-worth being sacrificed so the Enginerd did not have to stand up to his mother.

I am sure I am not telling any of you anything you don't already know... It takes 2 people to make a marriage succeed, and it also takes 2 people to make a marriage fail. The Enginerd would say that I hammered the final nail in the coffin of our marriage - I must point out that it was after years of failed attempts at resuscitation. What's done is done, and we all need to move on now. I would like to add that though the path we took to arrive at a divorce may not have been the most pleasant, I would not change the final result.

This whole experience has taught me many things:

I have learned who my true friends are. True friends stand by you when things are not rosy... They don't judge or pry. They don't indulge the rantings of others.
I have learned that one of my best friends is my sister. (Love you DH!)
I have learned that the Enginerd will never take any responsibility for our failed marriage. In his mind, everything will always be my fault.
I have learned that being happy will be my best revenge.

My Arch Nemesis… We meet again!

2010-10-13T01:00:00.000-07:00

So I am finally emerging from the fog that I have been in for the last few months. Upon exit from my cave, I realized that the holidays are right around the corner… I may not have realized that except for the fact that we were discussing our holiday party at work the other day, and even prior to that, I was invited to another holiday party.

So I did something that I never thought I would do… I bought an actual dress. I cannot even remember the last time I used my hard-earned money to purchase a dress! I have never liked dresses, and I can remember as a child telling my mother that someday when I buy my own clothes, I will never ever buy a dress. And for the past 20 years, that has been true.

But I thought that maybe it was time to spice up my image a little. So I bought the classic little black dress. Except in my case it isn’t “little”. {Isn’t black supposed to be slimming??} As I was trying this dress on, I realized something else – my back fat is running rampant!

I took my eye off of that back fat for just a few months, and it is taking over! What is a girl to do?? I will tell you – I bought a girdle, more commonly referred to as Spanx, which was non-returnable. My sister suggested that I buy the full bodysuit with the built in bra, but then my sister is a well-endowed girl on the top. I am more well-endowed on the bottom, and I really don’t want to minimize the top. Plus, the full Spanx created a uni-boob, which I also don’t want!

I opted for the style that looks like the girdle my grandma used to wear. Honestly, once I put that thing on, it is not coming off for a very long time. So I couldn’t figure out how to go to the bathroom with it on. Oh – silly me – there is a little opening in the crotch area.

Hello – I do not have a penis - how exactly am I supposed to use that opening? I have no idea. This truly is a mystery to me – and going to the bathroom under a variety of questionable circumstances is not foreign to me, but this is going beyond my ability! So I went back out and bought a slip that is like a girdle but without the legs. It has built in underwear with hooks in the crotch in case nature calls. It does not suck the fat in as well as the Spanx however. I think my need to suck in the fat is going to be greater than my need to go to the bathroom.

Doesn’t anyone wear pantyhose anymore? I can’t figure out where they are supposed to go… I can’t put them under the Spanx, because if I take the Spanx off, I am not going to be able to get it back on. If I put them over the Spanx, my roles may not be all smoothed out which would defeat the purpose of wearing the Spanx. And if I wear the slip, I am not sure if the pantyhose go over or under the built in underwear. Things have certainly changed in the last 20 years (which was approximately the last time I bought a dress).

Of course the sales lady at Macy’s told me that I should buy these pantyhose that have the “shaper” built right in. But I pointed out to her that the “shaper” part in those panty hose starts at my waist and there may be parts of me that spill out over the waist. I need full body support!

So the only thing I can figure out is that I am supposed to wear thigh-high stockings?? Is that the trick? If it is, I am hoping that when I put on the stockings that the fat that squeezes out of the top of the thigh highs can be sucked back in by the Spanx, or the slip.

Seriously it would have been so much easier to buy pants!

Wordless Wednesday

2010-09-29T04:28:00.000-07:00

I know I haven't posted in awhile... It's that whole divorce thing kind of putting a damper on my spirits... But I had the opportunity to go to a pre-season Pittsburgh Penguins game this past Saturday at the new Consol Energy Center. And I just had to share some pictures. First off, the tickets for the game were graciously provided by the Highmark Caring Place which is a fabulous resource for grieving children and families.

Ok - on to my photos...

Fall is here...

2010-09-07T03:45:00.000-07:00

In my book, it is officially fall! And I can't tell you how happy I am that it is finally here! Both of my kids are participating in fall soccer and swimming this year, and I am really looking forward to going to their games and meets and cheering them on.

I am preparing for a trip to California for work... I am fortunate that my company is based out of Sunnyvale and I am going next week for some training sessions. But I have never been to California so I am heading out a few days early to check out the sites! And I can't wait! I will be staying in San Francisco for a few days.

So I need some suggestions for great places to eat, and sites I MUST see! Please let me know - I am totally clueless with no plan (other that Alcatraz - those tickets are already reserved!)

Well it final happened...

2010-08-27T03:56:00.000-07:00

Remember a couple of weeks ago I mentioned I was only mildly pissed off?? Well, I have reached my breaking point and am now completely pissed off!!

I was with the Enginerd for 25 years... Yes - you read correctly 25 YEARS! So we have been through alot together... And I KNOW he is a good person at heart, and I thought that he knew that about me. I also thought his family knew that about me.

But yesterday I read an email that I was not supposed to see in which the Enginerd called me a "stupid bitch" because I didn't make my daughter try on her new school clothes BEFORE the first day of school. And my soon to be ex father in law replied with (and I quote), "What is wrong with her? I guess she doesn't give a shit."

For the record, I TRIED to get our very strong willed daughter to try her clothes on before the first day of school, and I DO give a shit... (Thought I should throw that in just in case there was any question!)

Why would such an email exchange like this even bother me? I will tell you why... I have an enormous amount of respect for my Father-In-Law. He is a good man! And when I was really down and out many years ago, he and my Mother-In-Law were there for me (this was long before the Enginerd and I got married).

Don't get me wrong, we have had our share of disagreements - no doubt. But underneath all of that, I thought of him as a true fatherly figure. So when I saw that email, I completely broke down.

It was bad enough that the Enginerd called me a "stupid bitch", but honestly I can deal with that... He is mad at me - he is going to be mad at me for a very long time.   The comment by my Father-In-Law cut like a knife.

But the story doesn't end there... A couple of weeks ago, the Enginerd and I went to my therapist together. He wanted to talk about some things, and that is a safe environment that I suggested.

During that session, he made his "last ditch effort" at a reconciliation. He claimed that his family is behind us and will be supportive if we choose to get back together. Really?? Not that I was considering a reconciliation, but that email didn't sound very supportive to me.

Then, the Enginerd took our children to Florida for a vacation for a week, and during that entire time, I couldn't get him to return my phone calls... I had to practically order him to have the kids call me. The entire week was extremely upsetting to me.

So I have a letter to the Enginerd...

Dear Enginerd:
     I am done with your mind games. I realize that you are upset and I am equally upset. But I am done allowing you to take advantage of me and this situation. I will continue to make sure the kids call you every night when they are with me, and I hope that you will keep your word and do the same when the children are with you.
     I would like to remind you that you are not to malign me to our children. And I would urge you to make sure your family understands that. I will continue to cooperate with you regarding any aspect of our childrens lives - we both love them and they are the priority.
     However, I have decided that trying to be "fair" with you regarding a financial settlement is not working. I think we should probably be sure that we are splitting our assets equitably and I am investigating exactly how we can do that.
   Regretfully, Me

Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop

2010-08-12T13:53:00.000-07:00

Well I haven't participated in some time, but I just had to take a few minutes today to join in Mama Kat's Writers Workshop:

The prompt I have chosen to address is #3...

The most unbelievable blue eyes you’ve ever seen…

As soon I as I saw this prompt, I knew who I would write about - my beautiful daughter K-Lo. She is the only one in our family with blue eyes, and they are just beautiful!

Ok - so her eyes are closed here, but I LOVE this picture of her - I think it was the last time she was quiet!

I just love gazing into her beautiful eyes!

Post it Note Tuesday....

2010-08-10T04:58:00.000-07:00

Well friends - I haven't posted in awhile... I have been busy trying to remain calm while dealing with my soon-to-be-ex.

I dedicate this Post -It_note Tuesday to the Enginerd... Pretty self-explanatory I think....

I feel much better now!

Update... (with a little venting)

2010-07-30T03:38:00.000-07:00

I must say - I might be the most naive person on the face of the earth...

I am certainly aware that divorce can be ugly... My parents divorced when I was very young and their relationship was... strained to say the least. But I really really believed that the Enginerd and I would be mature adults about all of this.

Well - I can now see why sooo many divorces go sour! For the last 17 years, I have paid the bills, invested our money, managed the savings, made sure the kids have college accounts and savings accounts. In addition, nobody in our household has ever wanted for anything EVER! Why would I all of a sudden want to cheat the Enginerd?? WHY? I have no f'n idea, but apparently I do!

I have tried to be fair - agreeing to split everything down the middle; underestimating the value of assets so that the Enginerd didn't have to come up with too much in a settlement; not forcing a sale of any assets or properties that may be held dear.

What has being nice gotten me?? Not a fucking thing! I just want this to be OVER NOW!

We are in the middle of a 90 day waiting period. There are 62 days remaining until the end of this waiting period (not that I am counting or anything?!?!?!). In theory at day 91, if all the paperwork is complete between the attorneys, we could sign the agreements, and then the attorneys just need to get a judges signature/approval. I really believed that this would all be done by the end of October - by Thanksgiving at the latest. Now - I am not so sure.

To be clear, my mind is not changing! I do not want to go back! The people who know me - really know me - have noticed a huge change in my disposition. I am actually happy again - and it feels effortless! Even with all the stress in my life right now - I am happy! WOW - it feels so good to say that!

This weekend, I am starting to move out of the house to a condo nearby. The moving truck will come next week to hopefully wrap up the move. I keep telling myself to just get through this move - everything will be better once I am out of the house.

I am just going to continue sitting in a fetal position, rocking back and forth, mumbling to myself now...

A sad post today...

2010-07-06T09:22:00.000-07:00

Well - it is Post it Note Tuesday, but I don't have any witty Post-Its today... This post is going to be a difficult one for me... I started this blog months ago to have a place to rant. None of my "real" friends or family knew about it. Then gradually, I told a few people. The result of that has been that I have censored this blog. Today will be a very uncensored post...

The Enginerd and I have decided to end our marriage. It is difficult to even type those words - I still cannot bring myself to say to D-word. We have been married for 17 years; I have been with him since I was 16 years old; this is something I NEVER thought I would I go through; it is a sad sad time.

We are trying to work together to make this separation as amicable as possible. Obviously we will always be in each others lives, and we are hoping to remain friends. He has been in my life for 25 years... He has given me 2 beautiful children... There was a time when we were happy and in love... I am holding onto all of that - he will always hold a special place in my heart, and a piece of me will always love him. But the sadness in our marriage is pervasive, and we both deserve to be happy. We also owe it to our children to create positive, happy environments for them, and we have failed at that for some time.

For all of my "real life" friends out there - please do not email, text, phone, or IM me with tons of questions. I do not want to talk! I have chosen a few select, very old, dear friends and family members to confide in about this. I am also continuing to see a therapist to work through the grief and all of the other emotions that I am experiencing right now.

Thank you friends - for listening to me ramble on about this difficult time.

Post It Note Tuesday

2010-06-15T06:37:00.000-07:00

I have been absent lately - just too many things going on. But today is Post It Note Tuesday! So I just needed to participate!

My thoughts today...

Wordless (Wordful) Wednesday

2010-05-26T11:46:00.000-07:00

OK - I am going on another rant today...

The picture above is of a retaining wall on the PA turnpike. I pass this wall every single day. And every single day, it infuriates me. Remember, I now have 45 minutes in the car to think, and stress, and obsess over many many subjects. This wall is a regular trigger for my angst.

I travel the turnpike between Monroeville, exit 57 (Old exit 6 for those long time PA turnpike travelers) and Cranberry Township, exit 28 (Old Exit 3). This wall happens to be right at the Allegheny Valley exit where they are replacing the bridges over the Allegheny River.

So, what's the big deal about this wall?? Well I will tell you... The oh-so financially responsible PA Turnpike Commission spent $250,000 to make this wall look like this - with all the crevices and the staining. Did you read what I just wrote?? $250,000- GRRRRRRR! Yes - this wall started out as just a plain old economical wall! But that just wasn't good enough for the fine PA turnpike! I have been so irritated by this wall, that I finally looked it up last night and found an article here about this wall. And what's the justification?? Well it only cost 0.13% of the total project budget?!?!?! Are you freaking kidding me???

I tell you what - I could have let me kids have at that wall for $250,000 - paint it / chisel it / whatever!

I can seriously think of many MANY better ways to spend $250,000! The American Society of Civil Engineers recently released a report giving Pennsylvania's bridges a "C" and its roads a "D-." Yet it was important to spend $250,000 to decorate a wall!

This kind of thing seriously makes my blood boil!

Thanks for listening!

Woo Hoo - my favorite bloggy day!

2010-05-25T03:53:00.000-07:00

Ok bloggy friends - It is (drum roll please.....) POST IT NOTE TUESDAY!

Here are my thoughts for the day:

Road Rage - the uncensored version...

2010-05-21T11:53:00.000-07:00

Ok - so you all know I started a new job a couple of weeks. My previous 10 mile commute is now about a 40 minute commute. It is almost all PA turnpike, so no big deal - NOT! I have noticed that by the time I get to work, my nerves are absolutely raw!

WTF is wrong with Pennsyltucky drivers?? As a side, I used to think that I was insulting PA by referencing Kentucky when referring to Pennsyltucky. I have changed my position - I apologize from the bottom of my heart to all the Kentuckians out there. I have no idea how Pennsylvania outranks Kentucky in educational statistics - if our drivers are any indication of the intellectual magnitude of the people of this commonwealth, we are in serious trouble!

First of all, why is it so damn difficult to merge?? MERGE DAMMIT! Don't start - stop - start - stop, then wait until I am on top of you to go!

When driving in the fast lane - you are actually supposed to be passing another car - i.e. driving FAST. If you don't want to drive fast then for the love of God, please just stay in the slow lane!

Do I have a sign on my van that says, "please cut me off"?? Well apparently I do. Yo Day Audi service van that proceeded to squeeze between me and the car in front of me on route 22 this morning just prior to the entrance to the parkway, F-You! What - there wasn't enough room behind me? There was nobody behind me you douchebag!

People on your cell phones - HANG UP! You are worse than drunk drivers! When I see someone at a red light yapping away on his/her cell phone, I just want to walk up to them, and yank the cell phone out of their hands!

Old retired people - why do you need to be out driving in the morning when working people who are still contributing to social security are trying to get to work so that you can continue to receive your social security checks? You cannot possible have anywhere to go - NOTHING IS EVEN OPEN yet! Stay home - sleep in - get out of my f'in way already!

Will the PA turnpike ever NOT be under construction?? Ever?? It is a freaking goat path that is always under construction yet there is no marked improvement? And while I am on the subject, whoever designed the drainage system for the PA turnpike should really be taken out and shot. Seriously, the slightest bit of rain and I am hydroplaning for miles.

I want a giant megaphone on the front of my van so that I can just scream at all of these people when they totally piss me off. Screaming INSIDE the car is not helping me!

Ok - I am done venting for now. Thanks for listening!

My kids crack me up...

2010-05-19T01:00:00.000-07:00

I am sure you can all relate... It is so fun to watch your kids personalities blossom as they grow. My kids both crack me up in different ways. My son, D-Ro is more quiet, with a really dry sense of humor; he's very thoughtful and perceptive. My daughter, K-Lo is all out there - loud; says whatever she thinks; very quick witted; to her, rules are mere suggestions.

So I thought I would share some funny exchanges we had this weekend... As you all know, last week was my first week of work at my new company. Incidentally it is so freaking quiet in my office - it's like a Think Tank! There has already been one complaint about the noise from my cube! (whatever - get over it!)

Anyway, after the first week, my brain was fried! I have never been exposed to so many acronyms and by Friday afternoon I was spent! So I met hubby and the kids at a local spot called Primantis. We luuuuuv Primantis! It is a bar/restaurant where the sandwiches have the cole slaw and fries right on them - yum! They have other great food too, but I always order the cheese steak!

Anyway, we took a booth in the bar area, and we were just sitting there waiting for our drinks, when I noticed something at the bar - the bar tender had gi-hugical boobs! Now one thing you need to know about me - I have a boob fetish. I have no idea why... But for as long as hubby and I have been together, I have always pointed out boobs to him. I just happen to always notice boobs. I think it must be a jealousy thing, since I am not so well endowed! So anyway, of course I pointed out the bartender to my husband so he could get a look. And of course my daughter noticed the boobs too, so she had something to say. But my son didn't seem to take note. Keep in mind, my son, who is 9 has yet to show any kind of interest in girls. But he realized we were looking at something that must be interesting. So he finally looked up at the bar, and got this little grin/smirk on his face... I asked him if he saw the bartender, and he turned red and just smiled. Sooooo funny!

Then after we stuffed our faces, we went home. Friday was cleaning day at our house. We walked into the house and everything was emaculate and it smelled so good! I said to K-Lo, "Wow it looks so clean and it smells so clean..." She laid down on the couch and hollered at me, "Stick your tongue out, I bet it even tastes clean!" Bwhahahahaha! What a little smart ass!

Love those kids!

Post it Note Tuesday

2010-05-18T04:19:00.000-07:00

My favorite bloggy day everyone - It's Post It Note Tuesday!

Here are my thoughts for the day:

Post It Note Tuesday

2010-05-11T04:22:00.000-07:00

Woo hoo - Post it Note Tuesday!

Here are my thoughts for the day:

Week in Review

2010-05-10T05:19:00.000-07:00

Good Morning everyone! Happy Mothers Day! I know Mothers Day was yesterday but I am celebrating today. Why - you ask?? Well every year, I ask for the same thing for Mothers Day, and that is to be left alone. Yesterday, I did not get to be left alone, and my kids were in super rare total jag-off mode! So today is all mine!

Let me bring you all up to speed since I was a little absent last week... I resigned from the Asylum and my last day was Wednesday, 5/5. But on Monday, I apparently ingested some type of food borne illness that lingered until last Friday. Seriously, I ate NOTHING from Monday night until Friday at noon. Ok - that's not true - I think I ate 12 crackers on Wednesday evening. I have never in my life gone for so long without eating. And I still have very little appetite, but now I think I am just a nervous wreck about starting my new job tomorrow.

The good news is that I think the lack of food shrunk my back fat! But I wouldn't recommend this method for back-fat-shrinkage long term!

Thursday I went to visit a friend who has 3 month old twin baby boys. The boys were born 10 weeks premature, so they are actually like newborns now. I spent the entire afternoon sniffing baby head! What a drug! Love that smell! I haven't held a little baby in so long. So I really enjoyed just holding and walking and talking to those little guys! I forgot how awesome it is to just snuggle a little one!

Friday I had a date day with the hubby. I actually ATE lunch that day. But the best news was that hubby and I jumped into this century and got iPhones! Love them! We also got a new smart phone for our home number (we haven't had a land line for years, but we keep a spare cell phone at home for the kids or babysitters or whatever). So now I am routinely getting text messages from my kids while they are downstairs and I am upstairs.

Saturday night I went to a jewelry bash to support the boosters club for my nephews high school volleyball team. It was a fantastic fundraiser where there were raffles and bingo. Unfortunately the fundraiser was right smack in the middle of the Penguins play off game, so Emilio sent me the score occasionally so I would know what was going on. I won Pirates tickets at the event, so it was totally worth my time! Even though the Pirates really suck, we love going to the games.

Then Sunday came... Every year, my family knows that the only thing I want for Mothers Day is to be left alone! Apparently that was not an option yesterday. We ended up spending the afternoon and having dinner with the out-laws. Actually spending the afternoon with hubby's family was fine, but my kids were just really pushing my buttons all day.

So today is my last free day before I start my new job tomorrow. I really am nervous about this change. But it is a good kind of nervous. I am starting the day getting the kids on the bus, and writing this blog post. Then I am having lunch with a friend from the Asylum - I didn't get to talk with him much last week, so we agreed to meet for lunch today. Then the afternoon is totally MINE!

I love these kinds of afternoons! I am going to go to the bookstore, and just look at all different kinds of books; sit in the mall and watch all the people; window shop; drink a cafe mocha if my stomach can handle it... Basically do whatever I want or nothing! Hopefully this little bit of downtime will settle me down for tomorrow.

I'll keep all of you posted on the new job this week.

My new little nephew!

2010-05-03T07:57:00.000-07:00

Woo hoo! I am honored to present my new little nephew - Baby B. Born 4/26/10, 7#3oz, 19 1/4" long.

He sleeps just like me with his arms in the air!

My sister is ALL Woman! No drugs! NONE!

Incidentally she still seems to be happy and content so the sleep deprivation hasn't caught up with her yet.

Friday Fatties

2010-04-30T06:25:00.000-07:00

My bloggy buddy Pam over at 2 Much Testerone has started a little cyber support system for those of us who are trying to shed some weight. So I am jumping on the bandwagon!

I have been obsessed with my weight for as long as I can remember. I have tried sooooo many diets including Atkins, Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, Herbal Life, Suzanne Somers… I am sure there are more, there are just the ones I can remember off the top of my head. I have always been mildly successful with each of these diets. But then my love of food overcomes my willpower. I can’t just have a “taste” of anything!

I have worked out for years. We have a gym at the Asylum (which I am going to miss more than anything except Emilio), and I go there usually 4 out of 5 weekdays. I generally do cardio and ab work. Fortunately, my new employer has a deal with a local gym as well, and I will be joining immediately upon starting that job.

Anyway, yesterday I had my annual visit to my doctor. I dread stepping on the scale more than the saddling up and putting my feet in the stirrups! Well, I have reached MAXIMUM density. As always, I asked the doctor if there had been any new scientific breakthroughs that I need to be aware of – like a new drug that is going to magically make me lose those 10 extra pounds. Nothing!

So I need to really buckle down now. My clothes are all a little snug around the middle. I can’t even blame my kids since my youngest is almost 8 years old!

The Enginerd is of no help! He has actually told me that he wouldn’t care if I was 1000 pounds if I was just happy with the way I looked.

One silver lining… Emilio and I were working out together in the gym yesterday, and he assured me that even though I am at maximum density, I may still be considered a MILF in some remote areas of the world. Thanks Emilio! Incidentally, Emilio wrote a lovely post on his blog last night about my departure from the Asylum. I intend to write a post about that in a few days, but I can’t do that right now because it just makes me cry!

Anyway, count me in for Fattie Fridays Pam!

Thank you to all my bloggy friends!

2010-04-29T03:51:00.000-07:00

As I was getting ready for work yesterday, I saw an interesting report on Good Morning America:

Grown Up Mean Girls: Mom on Mom Cyberbullying

This report was basically on Mom Bloggers and how nasty they can be. I am aware that some of you ladies have had to deal with that, and I am so sorry for that.

I started blogging to have an outlet to vent my frustrations. So there are days I am totally slamming the Enginerd, my kids, my coworkers. I vent here so I am less likely to vent at home or at work. But the idea that some of you have done the same and have been bullied by other Moms in one way or another is absolutely appalling to me!

So to all of you Moms out there with whom I blog and comment and email and tweet back and forth, I just want to say thank you for all of your support and encouragement! Thank you for not judging me and being so wonderful with all of your comments! Thank you for being grown up enough to know when I am joking or being sarcastic or just venting!

Love you guys!

Post it Note Tuesday

2010-04-27T05:04:00.000-07:00

Woo hoo! My favorite day for blogging! I communicate much better in short random thoughts on post-it notes!

Deep Thoughts n'at

2010-04-26T01:41:00.000-07:00

Random ramblings today:

I have accepted a position with another company and will be leaving the asylum. But not to worry, I know many people at the new company, so I am sure it will be just as crazy there! However, since accepting this new position, I have been so motivated at home. I have actually been getting up early and doing laundry and straightening up the house. Shocking I know! It's amazing what this little change has done to pick me up out of my rut!

I kicked the laundry fairy's ass this weekend! It was a hard fought battle, but I was victorious! For those of you unfamiliar with the laundry fairy, head over the Kate and Lydia's blog Rants From MommyLand to learn more - you can click here and here for some awesome funniness about the laundry fairy! While beating the laundry fairy to a bloody pulp, I learned that my daughter no longer wears matching socks. EVER. This has contributed to the pile of socks that appear to have no match. So, now I just throw her socks into her drawer un-matched, and let her sort it out.

Hubby and I had a lovely anniversary celebration... Grandma took Satan and Lucifer for the afternoon and night. Hubby planted his ass in the recliner, and I planted mine on the couch, and we drank heavily while watching the Pens play Ottawa. Then for old time's sake, I latched onto his neck like a leach, and gave him a sucker bite (it should be hidden by his shirt). Well when hubby realized what was happening, he started wrestling like John Cena - during the struggle to remove me from his neck, I seem to have pulled a muscle that spans my neck, shoulder, and back. That didn't happen when we were 16!

My 7-yr-old daughter is the most thoughtful, sweet, kind, and generous person I know! I have always thought she was an old soul. She says very mature things for a 7-yr-old. So the other night we were watching American Idol - actually she was watching and I was reading a book. They were having some kind of benefit for multiple charities, and apparently they were talking about helping children in other countries who are underprivileged or orphaned. So K-Lo decided we needed to adopt a child from one of those countries. And she didn't mean that we should send money. She wanted to bring a child here to live with us. While I was so touched by her compassion, I tried to delicately explain to her that we couldn't just adopt a child - Mommy and Daddy just can't take care of another child right now. So she said she would take care of "it". To which I said, "it" is a person! She is so sweet! She has brought this up a few times since then, trying to talk me into this.

My sister is scheduled to be induced tomorrow, if she doesn't go into labor sooner. This will be her first child. And she is clueless (weren't we all??)! I am so going to enjoy watching her mental decline!

Emilio is my super bestest BFF! He is such a nut, drinking and texting with me during the Pens game! Saturday night drunken texting and tweeting has become my new favorite past-time! We are planning our next book club for anyone who will be in the Burgh - not sure of the exact date yet, but I will keep everyone posted. If any of you are interested in learning more about Emilio, you can link over to his blog here. I also have a link in my sidebar.

I have removed my daughters Ben Roethlisberger jersey from her wardrobe! I will not allow any piece of clothing with his name to be worn by my children. He is a filthy disgusting douchebag, and I don't frankly care that he wasn't charged or convicted of assaulting the young lady in Georgia. I am so worked up about this that I had a dream I was in Lima Ohio which is Roethlisberger's hometown. I had the misfortune of spending 2 weeks in that town during my first job out of college - I suspect that he was probably about 10 years old at the time. Go away Ben! Pittsburgh is too good for you!

I bought the Reebok EasyTone tennis shoes. Relax they are not butt-fugly like the Shape-Ups. These shoes are supposed to tone my legs and ass. Yes - I fell for the marketing gimmick! Honestly I don't think there are any muscles in my ass. I have never been able to figure out how to "squeeze my glutes" unless I reach back there a grab a handful! Anyway, I will let all of you know if I notice any difference wearing these shoes.

Thanks for listening to my ramblings today!

Post-It Note Tuesday!!!

2010-04-20T03:55:00.000-07:00

Woo Hoo! This is my favorite bloggy day of the week! I love reading everyone's post it's today!

If you click on the post-it above, you can go over the Supah's site and check out everyone else's post-it notes today.

Here are mine:

Beautiful Mothers / Grandmothers Bracelets

2010-04-19T08:16:00.000-07:00

This weekend was my Mother-In-Laws (MIL) birthday. So I decided awhile ago to get her a special bracelet with her grandchildrens names on it, and their birthstones.

Some time ago, I found the most awesome website for this kind of jewelry - Tiny Sugars. The owner, Betty Ann is the most wonderful lady, and she will make anything you want! Love her! Emilio had a bracelet made for his mother, and I decided to do the same for my MIL.

Anyway, this is a picture of a bracelet similar to the one I had made for my MIL.

Betty Ann will customize any of the bracelets on the sight with names, birthstones, beads, whatever you want.

My MIL LOVED the bracelet! I totally scored a home run with this gift!

If you are searching for a special Mothers Day or birthday gift, I can't encourage you enough to take a look at the Tiny Sugars jewelry - you won't be disappointed!

Incidentally - I am not receiving anything for plugging Tiny Sugars - I just love her products and wanted to share with all of you!

New Kotex commercial

2010-04-14T01:00:00.000-07:00

Have any of you seen the new ad for the U Kotex products? There is a woman outside of a store, stopping people and asking them to go in and buy Kotex for her! One of the men actually asks her if he can just go in and get her a roll of toilet paper. (ew!)

I searched and searched for the video of that commercial, but I couldn't find it. As soon as I locate it, I will definitely post it. However, I did find one that was just as funny:

This scene just cracked me up! The Enginerd refuses to buy feminine hygiene products. EVER. He won't even say the words "period" or "tampon". It is especially funny when my 9-year old son makes completely uninhibited comments about my period - the Enginerd just cringes!

I shouldn't be surprised, the Enginerd also will not buy condoms. He is a 40-something year old man! He has obviously had sex - we have 2 children. And we don't want any more children, so... unless he gets off of his chicken-shit ass and gets a vasectomy, we will need to buys condoms. One time (at band camp - ok- I digress) we ran out, and I told him that we would have sex when he grew a set and bought condoms. I swear that was the first time the man ever bought them! He was so pleased with himself!

I noticed an empty box in the bathroom trash can the other day... I wonder if the Enginerd will surprise me and show me what a big boy he can be by stopping at the drug store all by himself!

Post It Note Tuesday

2010-04-13T04:58:00.000-07:00

My favorite day of the week! Woo Hoo - It is Post It Note Tuesday!

I dedicate this Post It Not Tuesday to all of my family and friends who provide plenty of ~~frustration~~ material about which I can ~~rant~~ wax poetic.

I am a Trend Setter!!!!!

2010-04-12T01:00:00.000-07:00

Heidi Montag is getting her Back Fat removed!!!! This was totally my idea!!!! Check out the article:

Montag’s ‘back scooping’ baffles many

Oh my Gosh! I have been ranting about my back fat for a couple of weeks. Now, all of a sudden, Heidi Montag is coming out to say she has back fat and she had it sucked out! I suspect she has been reading my blog and she checked out her back and realized she is getting back fat. I am guessing the photo above is the after picture.

Now honestly, I didn't even know who Heidi Montag was, but Emilio sent me the article Friday morning, and thought this was such an appropriate topic for my blog! Emilio had never even heard of back fat until I barged into his office a few weeks ago and told him that I had discovered it on myself. Now he is realizing the magnitude of this epidemic!

Honestly this is not the first time I have been a trend setter. This is just like the time I told the Enginerd that computer companies should make their computers in cool bright colors! Of course he thought that was a totally stupid idea, and he looked at me with that, "whatever you say" look. About 2 years later, what happened - Apple came out with the colored computers! Seriously I am way ahead of my time!

Writer's Workshop

2010-04-08T05:20:00.000-07:00

I havene't participated in Mama Kat's workshop in awhile, so I thought I would give that a try today.

I am going to try to tackle the first prompt:

Baby fever is in the air. Describe what you would do differently as a first time mom.

First off I was a first time Mom twice. What do I mean by that? Well I have 2 children, 16 months apart, and they couldn't be more different. For all you new Moms that have one child, the second one may be totally different, and you think you are going to "fix" everything with the second one, and it's like you are starting all over and have never even had a child!

With my first child, my son D-Ro, I took off about 4 months of work after he was born. I really enjoyed that time with him. And when it was time to go back to work, I didn't want to go. There was really no reason that I decided to take 4 months off as opposed to 6, 8, or even 12. The company where I worked at the time, would have allowed up to a year off. It was a wonderful time with my son. He was a cuddly little boy, and I loved holding him. Looking back I would have held him even more. And I was so upset when it was time to go back to work. That first day was so difficult!

So this was something I was going to "fix" with the second one. I was going to increase my time off and I was going to hold the second one all the time. NOT! I did decide to take 6 months off with our second, but honestly after about 2 weeks at home with BOTH of them, I called my husband and told him to get ready to take leave, because there was no way I could handle 6 months of this! Everything was totally different. First of all, the little girl didn't want to be held. EVER. Let me re-phrase, she didn't want to be held by me! She loved it when Daddy or Grandma held her. Just not me! Maybe she could sense the complete mental breakdown I was going through on the inside - I don't know.

She was also a puker. Constantly! At first, she seemed so uncomfortable - she would just cry and pull her little legs up - we new something wasn't quite right. We finally changed her formula to Alimentum which is a hypoallergenic formula, and it was like flipping a switch. The discomfort appeared to go away. She still puked non-stop, but she didn't appear to be in any pain. So this was wonderful, and I remember thinking that now we would be able to go out and go for walks and take her brother to the park. NOT! She started sleeping for approximately 20 hours per day! Ok - this sounds like a dream right? It really wasn't - I was a prisoner in our house. She wouldn't sleep anywhere but her bed. When I did go back to work, our babysitter was just astounded at how long she slept. She slept 6 out of the 8 hours she was there! Then we would get home and she would want to go to bed at around 5:30 or 6 pm - for the entire night. We never saw this child!

With my son, I worried all the time. I was on the phone with the pediatrician 2 or 3 times a week, about any little thing. I referred to him as Dr. Hottie. Thank goodness he was so wonderful! So I was going to "fix" this too. NOT! With our daughter everything was different, and I was still on the phone with Dr. Hottie 2 or 3 times a week! How did that happen - I had already been through one infant - why did it seem like I learned NOTHING??

With my son, I hated the binky! I hated it, and he loved it! Our babysitter helped wean him off of the binky at about 10 months. With my daughter, I was going to "fix" that. I took the binky away at about 3 months. The result - she started sucking her index and middle finger, upside down. She still does this today at night! She is 7! I really fixed it all right!

I think the morale of this story is that no matter what you do as a Mom, you think you should do something differently. But really, whatever you are doing is right for the situation. In the end it all works out! We all need to trust our maternal instincts a little more. Our kids will love us and never know the difference anyway!

Post It Note Tuesday!

2010-04-06T04:51:00.000-07:00

It's pretty sad when Hubby wakes up and says, "Hey it's Post it Note Tuesday!" This is the highlight of our week! Don't judge us! We have no life!

The chaos I create...

2010-04-01T04:36:00.000-07:00

I mentioned to all of you last week that I sent my resume to a friend at another company. Well I had an initial phone screen and a phone interview this week, and the hiring manager would like me to come in next week for an on site interview and to meet the team.

What is wrong with me?? Why can't I leave well enough alone?? I am not unhappy at the Asylum. I am in a rut, but I am not completely unhappy?

But my competitive nature kicks in as soon as I start interviewing... I don't put on any kind of show or misrepresent myself. In fact, I am brutally honest! I use interviewing as a time to screen the hiring manager and the rest of the team to make sure they are up to the task of handling me because I know I can be a handful. I have HR violation tattooed on my forehead! Seriously, I have been known to be offensive, loud, aggressive... I could go on and on. But in spite of all of that, I am passionate about my job and my projects, and I think that really does show.

So, what to do. Obviously I haven't been offered the job, and maybe I won't be, which will actually make things alot easier for me! But I am going to weigh the pros and cons of the Asylum versus the new company:

Why to stay at the Asylum:
- Good working environment
- 15 minutes from home
- great benefits

Why not to stay at the asylum:
- no confidence in upper management
- no opportunity to advance
- concern for the future of the company

Why to go to the new company:
- new challenge
- great place to work (according to everyone I know there)
- potential to lead larger projects / room to advance

Why not to go to the new company:
- 45 minute commute - less time with my family (ok that might not be bad!)
- odd hours due to dispersed teams around the world
- satellite office - concern for stability in a downturn

To top it all off, my BFF Emilio is at the Asylum. There is no doubt in my mind that Emilio could be hired at the new company - they have talked to him in the past, but he has been resistant to the longer commute as I am. What to do - what to do??

I am going on the interview next week. I will let all of you know how that goes.

In the meantime, I am heading over to Law Momma's site, Spilled Milk and entering her resume makeover contest. I wasn't going to enter it, but in light of the recent events, maybe I should.

I swear I am not happy unless my life is chaotic all the time!

Post It Note Tuesday!

2010-03-30T04:37:00.000-07:00

It's Post-It Note Tuesday Everyone! Is it wrong that I look forward to Tuesdays just for this! (ok - I really have no life!)

My Baby is 9 years old!

2010-03-29T10:18:00.000-07:00

My son will be 9 tomorrow! Where did the time go?? Seriously - I was looking at these pictures trying to find some good ones to post of D-Ro, and the past 9 years is really a blur!

I had never been around babies before my son was born. I remember begging the nurses not to make me leave the hospital. I was saying things like, "What is wrong with you people?? We don't know anything about babies, and you are just going to let us walk right out of here with this helpless little boy!"

I found soooo many pictures of me holding him, and both of us sleeping. I didn't realize how many pictures hubby took like that. When we were first home, I slept whenever he did. He would lay on my chest and we would both sleep. He just wanted to be held and snuggled. Looking back, I wish I would have just held him all the time - my mother says I did. I remember her telling me that I was going to spoil him if I didn't put him down.

Every summer ,we move to our cottage on the Allegheny River. This was one of my favorite pictures of him after one of his baths in the kitchen sink. He was a chunky little thing!

D-Ro loved riding his tricycle! He would ride and ride and ride! He is the same way with his bike. He was about 4 when he learned how to ride a 2-wheeler.

For his 3rd birthday, he insisted on having a Cinderella party. We (actually, it was my husband) tried to talk him into something else, but he wouldn't hear of it. So we finally just gave in, and he got his Cinderella party. He was thrilled - look at that face - he was beaming! He had a Cinderella cake, CInderella hats, noise makers, balloons - everything! Now he laughs at those pictures and can't believe he wanted a "girlie" party!

This is a picture of D-Ro on our ski boat. When he was 1 and 2 years old, he wasn't as thrilled about the boat. He would crawl under the drivers area and go to sleep whenever we went out on the boat. But by 3 years old, he really started enjoying it. Now he loves it! He spends every day on the river in the summer.

I just love watching him do karate! He is so confident when he is breaking boards! I am so proud of him every time he tests for a new belt!

D-Ro loves water sports! Skiing, swimming, kayaking - you name it! Last year he mastered one ski.

What a great kid he is! He is still my little sweetie - even though he is 9 now. Every morning he gets up and gives me a kiss and a hug. Still tells me he loves me - as long as his friends aren't around. Even though I complain about him (especially on Post-It Note Tuesday), I just love him to pieces. I am so lucky to be his Mommy!

Deep Thoughts n'at...

2010-03-26T04:21:00.000-07:00

Friday is finally here! This has been a very long week. I don't have anything structured today - I am just going to ramble on and on. If you bore easily, you may want to leave now... {Editor's note: You may wonder what "n'at" means especially if you are not from the Burgh. "N'at" is added to the end of most sentences here in Pittsburgh. Proper definition: and so forth.}

Little girl drama... When my 7-year old gets very very tired, she also gets very emotional. This happens roughly 2 out of 7 nights during a week. Last night was one of those nights. First the crying out of nowhere starts. Then the incoherent rambling about this girl said this and that girl did that, blah blah blah, on and on and on. The goal is to just get her to shut her eyes for about 30 seconds and she will pass out from exhaustion.

My son is really a funny kid. After all of the drama with his sister, I went to tuck him in, and asked him what was going on at school with K-Lo and her best friend. His explanation, "They are blond! They are all blond" Ha ha! D-Ro doesn't over-analyze - he just tells it like it is.

Today is Breakfast Day for me and the kids. On Fridays, we go to Eat n' Park and then I drive them to school. We haven't done this in awhile because they have been sooooo rotten, that I just couldn't bear the thought of enduring an entire meal with them in public. But they were pretty good this week, so we are going out for breakfast today. Great way to start the weekend!

I am really in a rut at work. I have told all of you before that I really do love my job and the company where I work. But I don't know if I am bored or overwhelmed or what... I just have no motivation to do any work! So a friend of mine called this week about a potential opportunity at another company. The conversation started with me saying, " no no I am not leaving the asylum - I just can't leave - I love it here..." and it ended with me sending her my resume. D'oh! I will keep you all posted on that.

I realized yesterday that I am developing back fat! Seriously - Back Fat! I don't understand what is happening to my body! I don't recall having fat back there before. And one of the little boys at work gave me an entire lecture about how my metabolism is slowing down and you can't target fat loss blah blah blah... Just to clarify, I have a group of young men at work that I refer to as the little boys because they just seem so young to me. One by one they are getting married and having kids, but there is still one little boy remaining.

Tonight is Emilio and Cybil's Book Club n'at - Woo Hoo! I know there are alot of you newer Mom's out there struggling for your own time away from you kids, where your husband takes some of the responsibility for the little terrorists. I am very lucky - the Enginerd has always stepped up to let me get out of the house for awhile (since 8-9 hours at work every day really isn't enough for me - ha ha!) Anyhoo - Emilio and I have been looking forward to book club for some time. We actually read 2 books, and we have resisted the urge to discuss them at length at work. So tonight we will be at the Rivertowne Pourhouse in Monroeville PA for book club. If anyone is interested in attending, come on over! I will be in cognito as myself - you can't miss me - I am typically the loudest one in any establishment, even though I am using my inside voice. Emilio will be with me and he looks like this:

{Editor's note to all single ladies in the Burgh: Emilio is single. I have been meaning to do a personal ad for him here on my blog, but I just can't summon the right words for it. For now, suffice it to say he is a great catch and if you are interested, you should email me or just show up at the Pourhouse tonight and we will interview you.}

The Enginerd and I will be hosting a sleepover for our son this weekend and several of his little friends. His sister is determined to stay here (as opposed to staying at Grandma's house) and terrorize them. I am pretty sure if she gets her way some of them may run screaming from the sleepover. Please pray for us. Actually, please pray for the Enginerd - he is in charge. I need my sleep!

Have a great weekend everyone!

Yo Tweeps!

2010-03-25T10:11:00.000-07:00

I thought I'd get in on the Yo Tweeps fun that SupahMommy is dishing out.

DIRECTIONS:

To play along and increase your twitter twaffic do the following:
1. Follow the first THREE Twitter Twaffic hosts listed on the linky. Netiquette and courtesy! They'll reciprocate your love on twitter!
2. MAKE A BLOG POST LIKE I am doing. Copy and Paste these directions.
3. Grab the YO Tweeps Twaffic Exchange Button pictured below from Supah's page. Put him in your post.

4. Put YOUR OWN twitter icon / link on your blog post like I did below

It should directly link to your TWITTER PROFILE.
6. Now make sure you go back to Supah's page and LINK UP THERE!!!!
7. Visit some other #YOtweeps linkers on the list.
8. Follow them if you choose and shout out to them on twitter that you are following so they can instantly follow you if they're on.

(Follow their blog as well if you're interested.)
Example:
@personsname #yotweeps I'm following!

9. If someone follows you JUST reciprocate on twitter. It's that easy.

Dear Husbands Everywhere...

2010-03-24T01:00:00.000-07:00

The Mommyologist had the most awesome post yesterday called Dear Husbands Everywhere. I have decided to add to her letters.

Please keep in mind that the following letters are fictional and do not depict any actual person or event (Thanks Law and Order - doink doink).

Dear Husbands Everywhere:
"Helping" with the laundry does not include taking it out of the dryer and dumping big piles of clean, unfolded laundry on the pool table. I suspect that you will not like it when your clean clothes are folded in a similar fashion and dumped on the floor next to your side of the bed.

Love, Your Adoring Wives

Dear Husbands Everywhere:
It has become apparent that you have some type of bowel obstruction since it seems to take you 30 minutes and a magazine to do your business in the bathroom. When you have finished with said business, it would be much appreciated if you left the bathroom in the same condition in which you found it - i.e clean any bodily fluids or any other material off the toilet and out of the toilet bowl.
Love, Your Adoring Wives

Dear Husbands Everywhere:
I believe you are fully capable of sorting the mail and throwing away the junk without checking with me - I trust you on this! You do not need to leave piles (and piles) of mail stacked on every flat surface of the kitchen. If you are unable to fit the junk mail into the garbage can because it is overflowing, please feel free to take out the garbage. You do not need to wait for me to ask you to take out the trash - I trust you on this too!
Love, Your Adoring Wives

Dear Husbands Everywhere:
I am sure that many of you have lovely mothers, but for those of you who don't (and you know who you are) please tell your mothers that your wives are fully capable of rearing children without unsolicited advice. I realize that many of you probably don't understand the magnitude of the problem when you mothers are not nice or are disrespectful to your wives. You need to Man-up!
Love, Your Adoring Wives

Post it Note Tuesday

2010-03-23T04:42:00.000-07:00

It's Post it Note Tuesday with the Supah Mommy!

2 out of 5 ain't bad

2010-03-19T01:00:00.000-07:00

My dear husband, the Enginerd is sooo busy at work that he has time to read the local new stories. A couple of days ago, he forwarded me this article: 5 Signs It Might Be Time For A Divorce, Sometimes You Just Need A Clean Break.

To summarize, the 5 signs it might be time for a divorce are:
Infidelity
Financial Irresponsibility
Repugnance
Addiction
Meanness

Hubby thought we only met 2 of the criteria, a third was questionable. So I started analyzing these signs in a little more detail:

Infidelity - No doubt this is a sign that you need a divorce. But as I have told the Enginerd, I would NEVER divorce him - I would rather make him live in fear for the rest of his life!

Financial Responsibility - We really don't have a problem with financial responsibility - what's mine is mine and what's his is mine too! Ok - not really. We each keep our own money. And I am completely irresponsible with mine, and I have no idea what he spends his on. Then there is a joint fund used for bills.

Repugnance - this was the questionable sign. I think I have said this before, maybe not - I am terrible at keeping up with the housework and the dishes; the laundry is piled up; there is clutter in our kitchen. A person who doesn't live here may think it really is repugnant - usually it is! I have said many times that if a thief ever broke into our house, he would immediately leave because it appears as if our house was already hit!

Addiction - Ok we fail this one. I make alot of crafts, and hubby believes it is an addiction - we have argued about it - and I have really had to cut back. He loves hunting in the fall, so he is generally out of commission from September through December. I'll admit that since we had our kids, he has really cut back on his hunting, which is unfortunate because I love when he goes away so I can craft all weekend!

Meanness - We fail this one too. We have been together for 25 years - since high school. We have been married for 17 years. And I have a really sharp tongue! Hubby has had to learn how to retaliate, and he does quite well. We have said some really horrible things to each other, and there are NO subjects off limits At this point, it's like water off a ducks back. We are both all talk!

So there you have it - 2 out of 5 ain't bad - and we are damn proud! As we were talking about this the other night, I took the opportunity to remind the Enginerd that we ARE soul mates. He still isn't pleased about that!

Mama Kat's Writers Workshop

2010-03-18T13:08:00.000-07:00

It's time for Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop

I have decided to tackle Prompt #4:

Describe how your relationship with your spouse is different then the relationship your parents had while you were growing up.

Wow - this is a doozy! My parents divorced when I was very young, around 5 or so. And they rarely spoke after that. I vividly remember planning my own visitation with my father starting at about age 10. My mother avoided confrontation and conversation with my father at all cost!

In fact I moved in with my father when I was 16. When it was time for high school graduation, I didn't even think my mother was going to attend because she didn't want to deal with my father - she did eventually decide to attend. As a child, I didn't think much of any of this - it was normal to me.

However all of that being said, I KNEW that I did not want to subject my children to that same type of dysfunction. My husband and I have been married for almost 17 years. We have had rough times like all couples, but there is a fundamental trust between us.

Before we had children, we talked seriously - if we were thinking about getting out, we needed to do it before the kids came. Once the kids came, we had to make this work no matter what! We approach everything as a team - equal partners. We share responsibility for the kids, the housework, laundry... The kids know we love each other. We don't hide arguments from them, but they also see us compromise and make-up.

My sister-in-law calls us the "Bickersons" because we apparently bicker bicker bicker. I don't even notice that; I guess it has just become second nature. The kids don't think much of it either - they jump right in!

All in all my relationship with my husband is completely different than my parents relationship, thank goodness!

Wordless Wednesday

2010-03-17T08:01:00.000-07:00

This is my weekly calendar:

Is it any wonder I get nothing done at work?? I set time aside this afternoon to actually WORK. You'll notice the funny names for the meetings - we name our projects after guns this year. Love that!

Post it Note Tuesday

2010-03-16T10:09:00.000-07:00

It's Post it Note Tuesday with the Supah Mommy!

My word of wisdom for the day:

Big Ben...

2010-03-13T04:42:00.000-08:00

I have something to say to Ben Roethlisberger...

Where to begin?? Oh yes - WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU??

Pittsburghers overlooked your alleged encounter last year... Seriously why did the alleged victim wait an entire YEAR to report anything??

However circumstances are a little different this time. I love the article on KDKA where Ben "concedes that he did have contact with the woman that was not consummated and that afterward the woman slipped and fell, injuring her head."

Um - Ben - your penis in any orifice of this girl is a little more than "contact"!

Ok - maybe I am being too harsh - maybe you really didn't do anything inappropriate, I mean we do have this little thing here in the US called "innocent until proven guilty" right?

But there does seem to be the appearance of impropriety - isn't that somewhere in your contract?? Why are you hanging out with college co-eds? Aren't you like 30?? GROW UP! Art Rooney Sr is turning over in his grave right now!

Get new handlers Ben - people who are going to guide your immature ass. Those 2 off-duty police officers hanging with you are not doing a very good job!

Pittsburghers are all upset about this now. But as Emilio has pointed out to me, as soon as you throw your first touchdown pass, everyone will forget about this. Sad really.

There is a little saying, "Fool me once - shame on you; Fool me twice - shame on me!"

I am anointing your arrogant ass with an award Ben. Wear this with pride - you have earned it!

Woo Hoo - I am guest blogging!

2010-03-12T04:19:00.000-08:00

Yippee! Law Momma asked me to guest blog over at her place, Spilled Milk. If you have never visited her, you must head over there now. I just love this lady! I read her blog every day, and the stories she tells are so close to my own. So don't hesitate - go over there now.

Go ahead....

Click the link: Spilled Milk

You can come back here later - I have something to say about Ben Roethlisberger.

Pap Pap's Busted

2010-03-11T01:00:00.000-08:00

My dear father-in-law recently had his hip replaced, so he has been on a medical leave from work during his recovery. A couple of weeks ago, school was canceled at the last minute, and he graciously agreed to let Satan and Lucifer go to his house for the day. The love Pap Pap so this was a great opportunity for them to spend some time with him and also help him out so he didn't overwork his hip.

The report was good that evening... Everyone had a great time with Pap Pap. We asked what they did all day. Well - they helped Pap Pap if he needed anything; he taught them how to play poker; they watched some TV together. Really - well what did you watch on TV... The conversation went like this:

the Enginerd: What did you watch with Pap Pap?

Lucifer (our darling 7 yr old daughter): Something inappropriate.

the Enginerd: Why do you think it was inappropriate?

Lucifer: Because there was a lady with her boobs out.

Satan (our darling 8 year old son) isn't saying too much here - he's not ratting out Pap Pap.

Me: Did Pap Pap change the channel?

Lucifer: Well when the boy came in a got on top of her in the bed, then he changed it. But a couple minutes later, he changed it back so he could see what happened.

Me: Was there weird music in the background that sounded something like "bow chicka bow wow" (imagine porn music here)?

Pap Pap should really know better - the little girl has NO secrets! Pap Pap was Busted! Apparently the move wasn't very memorable because when I asked him what happened he couldn't remember.

Wordless Wednesday

2010-03-10T03:58:00.000-08:00

My Father-In-Law and my son walking down by the river.

Post it Note Tuesday

2010-03-09T01:00:00.000-08:00

It is Post it Note Tuesday, hosted by the Supah Mommy!

Here are my random thoughts on this lovely Post it Note Tuesday:

Emilio and Cybil's Book Club

2010-03-05T08:39:00.000-08:00

My BFF, Emilio and I have started a book club. We have 2 members - me and Emilio. Book reviews are held whenever we feel like it (at least every other month) at the Rivertowne Pourhouse where we like to drink heavily.

We have both finished reading the book Many Lives, Many Masters by Brian Weiss MD:

This book is about past lives and souls, and how our souls travel together through multiple lives. So my husbands and my soul may have been together in a previous life. We may not have been husband and wife, we may have been father and daughter or mother and daughter or some other relationship. And we may be in a future life together. This book is very intriguing and thought provoking. I was telling my husband about it and this is how the conversation went:

Me: We may have been together in a previous life.

the Enginerd: Oh yea?

Me: Yes (very enthusiastically)! And our souls may travel together into future lives because really, I think we are soul mates! We could be together for infinity and beyond!

the Enginerd: (as all the blood drained from his face) Are you fuckin kiddng me?? I am not going to get rid of you after death??

I completely ruined his weekend! ha ha!

Tell Us About Your Trip

2010-03-04T08:09:00.000-08:00

I have decided to participate in Mama Kat's Writers Workshop today, and the prompt I am tackling is: "Tell Us About Your Trip."

The trip I am going to tell you about is our trip to Disney World 3 years ago. Satan and Lucifer were 5 and 4 years old respectively. Ah - Disney World - what a wonderful magical place, right?? WRONG! We will NEVER EVER go back! It was the most miserable week of our lives! Take that Mickey!

The really funny thing about Disney World is that we saw very few happy faces there. We did see a lot of exasperated parents, screaming babies, and whining children (including our own). And the Enginerd and I looked at each other many times during our trip and asked how this organization keeps up the facade that this is the most wonderful place on earth??

My kids wanted to see Lizzie McGuire and the gang from High School Musical and Phil of the Future - well those characters really aren't represented at Disney. We did do the whole Princess picture thing, and my daughter enjoyed that (that was one bright spot in our day at the Magic Kingdom). 3 rides broke down while we were there - 2 of those rides broke down while we were on them, and Space Mountain broke down just before we were ready to get on it - they evacuated Space Mountain, and we didn't go back to try and ride later. My kids wanted to leave Magic Kingdom and go back to the hotel and swim at the pool. But the Enginerd and I were determined that we were going to have a good time at Disney DAMMIT!

We did Animal Kingdom and MGM while we were there, and we won't go back to either of those parks either. The kids tolerated Animal Kingdom pretty well. But I can take them to the Pittsburgh Zoo and they would be just as happy. Actually they LOVE the Pittsburgh Zoo, so they would probably be happier there than at Animal Kingdom.

In retrospect, we don't know if they were just too young or we tried to cram in too many activities... We have been to Orlando since this trip, but we didn't go back to Disney - my son NEVER wants to go back.

I know there are a lot of Disney lovers out there and that what I am saying is considered sacrilege to many. Am I the only one with enough testicular fortitude to admit that we hated Disney World??

I Want a New Drug

2010-03-03T04:30:00.000-08:00

I am going on a rant now... What is wrong with the medical community that they cannot invent a drug that makes me stop gaining weight?? Every time I go to the doctor, I ask the same thing, "Are there any new drugs out there to make me lose weight?" There never are!!!

My father-in-law says, "it's easy, just stop eating so much." It would be easier if there were a drug, and I am certainly not opposed to popping a pill for any ailment. Why is it that the drug companies can make a drug so that a man can get his rocks off, but they can't make a drug to help me lose weight?? I guarantee it has something to do with all of the men in the board room - don't even get me started on that!

So, I have decided to stop using the bathroom scale! That thing makes me so mad! Never mind the fact that I have started growing rolls on my back. I put a pair on pants on yesterday and I looked like a stuffed sausage! What has happened to me??

I get on the elliptical machine every day at 4 pm (we have a gym at work), and I run my ass off on that stupid thing. But obviously is is DOING NOTHING because my ass is growing. I even switched to Mike's Hard Lemonade, LIGHT.

No more! I am getting back on the bandwagon now! I have been a lifetime member of Weight Watchers for many years, so I know the routine. Effective immediately (after I have a donut) I am turning this situation around.

I'll keep all of you posted on my progress.

Post it Note Tuesday

2010-03-02T00:50:00.000-08:00

It is Post it Note Tuesday, hosted by the Supah Mommy!

Here are my thoughts for the day:

The Gateway to the Twilight Zone

2010-03-01T04:59:00.000-08:00

I know I am not the only person with this problem, but it has gotten completely out of hand! My clothes dryer eats socks!

This is just a sampling of the socks that do not have matches in my house. How does this happen? Note the lovely folding table which doubles as a pool table.

I have examined the dryer trying to figure out where all of the socks go (I want to go there too!) My mother thinks I am nuts, until we visited her and lost 2 socks in the 3 days we were there.

To my clothes dryer: I give up! Either return the socks, or take me to be with them!

Feel Good Friday!

2010-02-26T04:38:00.000-08:00

Well its Feel Good Friday over at The Girl Next Door Grows Up.

So I thought I would list some things that made me feel good this week.

My son had a book project due today, which I found out about on Wednesday. He worked on the project, and needed no help! He typed a bunch of information about the book, and made a big poster board with his book summary and some beautifully drawn pictures. He didn't ask for any help - I was so proud of how he took the initiative and responsibility to get this done on his own.

Along those same lines, my daughter completed her spelling assignment on her own, and presented it to me Thursday morning. She did a fantastic job - so creative! Again, I was so proud!

Sunday, my son and I spent the afternoon together. We went grocery shopping and out to lunch. It was a wonderful time, and the perfect start to the week. Just some Mommy/D-Ro time! I loved it!

This morning, my daughter got up and the first thing she did, was kiss me and tell me she loved me!

We had very little snow this week and we actually saw the sunshine a couple of days here in the Burgh! What a nice change!

Have a great weekend everyone!

I had an affair...

2010-02-25T04:31:00.000-08:00

Not THAT kind of an affair! You people need to get your minds out of the gutter! I would never have THAT kind of an affair! My husband and I have a deal - whoever leaves has to take the kids - therefore nobody is leaving. We will remain together in spite of each other (just kidding). And as I told the Enginerd - I don't want to have sex with anyone - it's nothing personal against him!

Back on topic... I cheated on my hairdresser! (gasp!)

I have been going to the same hairdresser off and on for about 20 years. I have naturally curly hair, and it really seems to be a talent to be able to cut that type of hair. My hairdresser saw me through the 1990s when I had gi-hugical hair! He saw me graduate from college, and get my first job. I have a serious relationship with this man!

He has always done a great job with my hair. However about 6 months ago, something went wrong. You need to know that I can't stand it when my hair is not perfectly even on either side of my face - I NEED symmetry! Seriously, my eyes are highly calibrated and I can detect if things are off even a micro-fraction of a millimeter. I thought maybe he just had a bad day, but a couple of months later, the same thing went wrong!

I talked to K-Lo, my 7-year-old daughter about this a couple of weeks ago. Oh the drama! "What do you mean you are leaving Bill?? I luuuuv him! Can we visit him? He is one of my cuties!" K-Lo has a thing for older men, and she has this group of older men that she calls "her cuties". This group includes our hairdresser Bill, my BFF Emilio, Steve Martin, and her Uncle Dwightie.

So Tuesday I went to a new hairdresser, Tammy. I popped an extra Prozac that day so I would remain calm. And I am so happy to report that she did a FABULOUS job! She made my week!

So now I need to leave Bill, and it is stressing me out. Maybe I will just pop an extra Prozac for a few more days until the guilt wears off.

Post it Note Tuesday

2010-02-23T08:02:00.000-08:00

Update on meeting with the VP

2010-02-22T16:18:00.000-08:00

Well, I met with my Engineering VP today about the Senior Managers position. He did urge me to apply after he informed me that I "freak out" all the time, and we would need to work on that. Of course, I told him that based on his other direct reports, it appeared as if he encouraged "freaking out." That went over well.

Anyhoo, the job is going to suck royally! Seriously, I am afraid I would HATE it! It is all process related. Meaning, he wants someone to define our processes and compile data, and prepare status reports. YUCK! He seemed very surprised that I was hesitating to apply. He also told me they had already interviewed an external candidate who was just "too obnoxious." WOW! I am feeling really encouraged about how they are screening candidates! I ended the conversation by telling him that if I were to apply, one of the main reasons would be because I am really REALLY concerned about him hiring a moron. (I didn't actually say moron... wait a second, maybe I did.)

As Emilio pointed out to me, now I MUST apply. Because if I don't, it will appear as if I have no career aspirations. But honestly, I really have no career aspirations, especially if I am not going to be able to freak out at work anymore! I am now actively trying to get one of the other project managers to apply for this job. I would work for either of them, and one of them would be perfect for this position!

So I will keep all of you posted. I will probably submit my resume. I will have to go through a whole series of interviews with people I work with every day. It should be very entertaining.

I am so honored!

2010-02-21T18:36:00.000-08:00

The very lovely Susie from {Not Quite}Susie Homemaker has honored me with an award:

Thank you Susie! I love your blog! The rules to pass along this award are:

•Be polite, say thank you to the blogger that gave this to you & give 'em a linkback.

•Pass it on to about fifteen other beautiful bloggers that you've recently discovered.
•Link 'em.
•Notify 'em.
•Say seven things about yourself

I have 5 blogs I am going to pass this award to:

The Old Woman in the Shoe has got Nothing on Me

Everyday Kings

Mommyhood by the Handful

Insignificant Ramblings from the Looney Bin

Are You Listening

I enjoy all of your blogs - You are all truly Beautiful Bloggers!

I am not a very interesting person, but here are 7 things about me:

1. My favorite food is Heinz ketchup. Love that stuff on everything!

2. I love TV! My favorite shows are House, CSI, Criminal Minds, anything with the FBI, The Housewives of New York City, The Universe, The Deadliest Catch... I could go on and on.

3. I have become a Pittsburgh Penguins fan in the past several years. My son and I like watching the games together. And we have been totally into the Olympic Hockey games!

4. I married my high school sweetheart. We have pictures of us together at the prom.

5. My first job was as a Christmas gift wrap girl at the big blue Sears in East Liberty, which is a neighborhood of Pittsburgh. My Dad wanted me to wrap all of our Christmas gifts at home, and I didn't want to because because I wrapped gifts all the time at Sears. So he brought all of the gifts to Sears for me to wrap them there.

6. I whistle all the time. Everyone I work with knows I whistle. My husband hates it! I have been whistling for a really long time, and I have been told it is completely un-ladylike, which makes me do it more!

7. I grew up in a funeral home. According to my husband, that has contributed to my very warped sense of death (not sure what he means when he says that). It was just kind of normal to have a body in the house, and I didn't think much of it if I needed to barge into the embalming room to ask my Dad something or get him to sign a note for school, or whatever.

Thanks again Susie! You made my day!

I am really in a rut....

2010-02-21T04:18:00.000-08:00

This is going to drone on and on. So if you are easily bored, you may want to leave now.

I usually have something upbeat to post, but not today. I have felt really down for the past week or so. I am not sure if it's the weather or my hormones or what. I finally finished a little project at home that I have been working on for some time, so I am hoping my mood improves from that. I just don't feel like doing anything. ANYTHING!

Now there is a new position posted at my company that I am contemplating, and I feel so unsure of myself - I just don't know what to do, and it is tearing me up.

When I started at the Asylum, we had a Project Management Office (PMO), and the Manager of that office hired me. Through a series of reorganizations, that position was eliminated, and now I work for an engineering director. My previous manager is still at the Asylum, and he has been promoted, so he is doing well. I liked my old boss, I like my new boss - no complaints there.

Now there is a position posted for a PMO Manager, and I just don't know what to do. I love managing projects! And right now I have two gentleman who report to me, and they are just awesome! Why are they awesome? Because they are so self sufficient that they manage themselves! I don't have to worry about them! They get me involved when they need someone to fight a battle for them, and they just don't have the time. Perfect for me! But this new position will have all of the Project Managers reporting to it as well as a few others.

Honestly I decided a long time ago that I wasn't necessarily interested in moving up the corporate ladder. I like to say what I think! I like to be a part of the engineering teams that get the products into production! I like to push my project teams so make stuff!

Why would I even be interested in this new position? Well, I am very concerned about who may be hired for this new role. I want a manager who is going to push for me, my projects, and all of the other project managers; I do not want a pushover who is easily bullied. I want someone who is going to promote Project Management throughout the organization. I KNOW that I can do that! But at what cost? Will I still be able to manage projects? I am not sure. What if this role takes me away from working closely with the engineers? More importantly, what if I am really NOT strong enough to lead at a higher level?

My BFF Emilio and I have talked about all of this. He thinks I need to have a plan for how to "fix" things. I am not even strong enough to tell Emilio my ideas for how to "fix" things at the Asylum for fear that he will think they are terrible! And I have another dear friend at the Asylum who has already told me she doesn't think I should go for this position because it will take me away from what I really like to do. Honestly, I don't believe that is why she is dissuading me - She would report to this new position, and we are friends. For a variety of reasons, I don't think she wants to report to me. But all of this makes me more unsure.

I am going to meet with my VP of Engineering tomorrow to talk a little more about this position. Please keep me in your thoughts. I really need to summon some confidence before that meeting!

The Sunshine Award

2010-02-17T09:56:00.000-08:00

I was very excited when Mary at The Mommyologist and Mrs. Bliss at Housewife Bliss awarded me my very first blogger award!

Thank you so much Ladies! I read both of your blogs every day, and love them!

The rules for accepting the Sunshine Award are as follows…
1. Put the logo in my post or within my blog.
2. Pass the award onto 12 fellow bloggers.
3. Link the nominees within my post.
4. Let the nominees know they have received this award by leaving a comment on their blogs.
5. Share the love and link to the person who gave you the award!

Now, I get to pass this award on to 12 bloggers who bring a little sunshine to my day!

2 Much Testosterone

Handbags and Handguns

Spilled Milk

Letters from Crazyville (A Mom on the Edge)

Me, the Man, and the Baby

{Not Quite} Susie Homemaker

The Dapper Darling

Who's That Girl

Thanks to all of you! I enjoy all of your blogs!

Signs Signs Everywhere are signs....

2010-02-16T00:00:00.000-08:00

My BFF, Emilio and I went out Friday night for some deep conversation. He asked me if I believe in signs - as a matter of fact I do! His question got me to thinking about signs my daughter has sent me in one way or another during her young life.

My daughter is a little pistol. She is full of energy and she has a good time wherever she goes. Rules seem to be mere suggestions to K-Lo. The kicker is that she is only 7, so sometimes the signs I am being sent are a little unnerving.

We had a wonderful babysitter for our kids when I went back to work. She is our-Martha! We love her! she is absolutely the kindest, most wonderful lady, and she treated our children as her own. K-Lo was the flower girl in our-Martha's sons wedding. She is so dear to us. But I think K-Lo was really going to be the one to put her over the edge. K-Lo spent time in timeout at our-Martha's every single day. In 5 years, I think D-Lo was in timeout less than 5 times. But for K-Lo, it was every single day. At one point, she finally learned to stop talking back, and just started rolling her eyes at our-Martha. Incidentally I have no idea where she gets that eye-rolling thing ;-) Eye-rolling had to become a time-out offense. Can you imagine having a 2 year old roll her eyes at you?

K-Lo was a bit of a climber, not as bad as some stories I have heard, but she did like to crawl up on chairs by herself. Imagine my surprise when she is at my out-laws and I get there to see her up on the picnic table dancing around the umbrella pole. Hmmmm - what is this sign telling me??

At 3 years old, we already had to explain to her about a penis and a vagina. She has a brother who is 16 months older - clearly their bodies are different, and she noticed right away. So we explained at a very high level that boys have a penis and girls have a vagina. We also told her that she really should not talk about penes (I bet you didn't know the plural word for penis!) and vaginae - this is a private subject ,and we shouldn't throw those words around. After that whenever she would get really mad, and she didn't think we could hear her, she would whisper "Penis-Vagina". This was her little 3-year old version of swearing. Nice! It took awhile to break her of that! What is this telling me??

On another occasion when she was three, she and her 4 year brother and 4 year old cousin Zack were playing. Zack was staying over that night, and the 3 of them were having such a wonderful time. The Enginerd told them it was time to get their jammies on, and before we could get in there to supervise, there stood Zack naked from the waist down. Our sweet daughter looked at him and said, "Zack - why is your penis so small?" Poor Zack! Poor Zack's Dad! I am hoping this is not a foreshadowing.

On her first day of kindergarten, I sent this adorable little girl to school with cute little braids in her hair. She looked so angelic with her blond hair and blue eyes. I was a little worried that she would have some separation anxiety. When she came home, I asked her about school, and she said everything went well. I asked if she missed me, and she said that she didn't. I asked how all of the other kids did on their first day, and she said, "Everyone was crying for their stupid mommies!" Wow - she is heartless!

At 6 years old, she knows that swearing is not allowed even though I swear like a sailor and make no apology for it. So one evening at soccer practice, she is having a really bad night. She is hungry, grouchy, and sweaty, and she really has no tolerance for anything or anybody around her. I am trying to talk her down and just keep her level until I can get her home and ~~slip her some Benadryl~~ feed her. She looked at me and said, "Mom - I just want to swear right now!". Me too!

The Enginerd and I have discussed our darling daughter - what to do with her - that sharp tongue, the need to speak before considering the consequences, her raging temper. I have already warned all of her friends moms - oh she's cute now, and they need to remember that when the girls are all teenagers and we are bailing them all out of jail because they listened to K-Lo!

In all seriousness, K-Lo has the self confidence I didn't develop until I went to college. She's is so bright and funny and she can talk to anyone. I hope she keeps all of those traits through her teen years and into adulthood.

Mathematics

2010-02-15T04:08:00.000-08:00

I am married to an Engineer. I have a degree in Engineering as well, but have forgotten everything that I learned in college (except of course how to do no-handed shots). The Enginerd has informed me that there is a very small window of time each month when I am actually not opposed to having sex. He has calculated this period of time using the following formula:

This formula boils down to a 36 hour period of time each month. He tracks this time religiously! He can pin point the time within +/-30 minutes, and he lets me know when it is coming, just so I know he knows.

Ironically, this month the time fell right on Valentines Day morning. So he had a lovely Valentines Day.

Now we are back to having hall sex which is where we just say "F-you" as we pass each other in the hall. He is already calculating next months time.

Happy VD everyone!

5 for Friday

2010-02-12T07:22:00.000-08:00

Hi everyone! TGIF!!!!! Although I don't know why I am happy about that - the kids haven't been in school for a week, and guess what - Monday is Presidents Day, so they won't be going back until Tuesday. GRRRR! My morning was hellish, so as I was driving into work, I was thinking about all the things I hate. Nothing like that subject to prompt a little road rage! Anyway these are the things I hate on this Friday morning:

5. I hate grounding the kids. It is more punishment for me than them honestly. To be clear about Da Rules at our house, we posted them along with the consequences for breaking them on the refrigerator and each one of us signed. They were reviewed and explained in detail. But little Satan could not help himself this morning, and now he is grounded. Tomorrow is going to suck!

4. School cancellations - I am so sick of school cancellations. And when all the other districts are canceling, our waits, which makes it very difficult to make plans. And another thing - WHY DON'T THEY HAVE SCHOOL ON MONDAY???? Apparently, Monday is a "Staff Development Day for Teachers", but no school for students. Why not make TODAY the Staff Development Day?? Am I speaking totally foreign? There is no reason those teachers should not be at work today? The roads are clear and the rest of the world is working!!!! Please don't misunderstand, I love my childrens' school - I really do - and they have some really awesome teachers (who should be at work today!)

3. Pittsburgh Mayor Luke Ravenstahl and all of the whining Pittsburghers. YOU VOTED HIM INTO OFFICE! Your streets are not plowed and he is a 26 year old moron and YOU VOTED HIM INTO OFFICE. Honest to God, I think you could put a monkey on the democratic ticket in Pittsburgh, and he would be elected.

2. The Parent Teacher Organization (PTO) at school. Is there a reason that the PTO meetings are always during the middle of the day, instead of in the evening? They have conducted one evening meeting, to which I went, and I actually found it very informative. Apparently they didn't like the fact that some working mom's showed up, so they have never done that again! I spat on them!

1. Senior Citizens on the road. Why must senior citizens choose to go out during the peak traffic hours?? They have all day! Go at a different time - You cannot possibly need that much bread and milk!!

Tonight my BFF Emilio and I are going out for drinks. This has been a long week for both of us with all of this snow. So we are going out for some girl time, even though Emilio is a boy and he is not gay.

I wish all of you a great weekend!

We survived the Snowpocalypse!

2010-02-08T17:59:00.000-08:00

Well we dug out of the snowstorm, and now the kid are enjoying a couple of days off of school. Actually I did no digging - I would prefer to hibernate for the entire winter, but the Enginerd and the kids work all day on our driveway. I thought I would share some pictures.

This is the view from our back door onto our deck. I know we are supposed to have the awning taken down for the winter, but we never have. It was here when we bought this house, and we never knew who to call. We are now waiting for it to cave in from the weight of the snow. The Enginerd put some supports under it to try to keep it from ripping off of the house

This is a picture when we opened our garage door after it stopped snowing on Saturday morning. Notice, the cars in the driveway and not in the garage. Grrrr! We have a 2 car garage and there is crap on either side and in the middle with a path to each garage door. We have never parked a vehicle in this garage, and I suspect we never will.

Finally after shoveling and plowing all day, my son was king of the hill. He was having a great time wearing his Dad's snow shoes.

I finally ventured out of the house for the first time this morning. Our municipality, Murrysville, PA did a fabulous job of cleaning off the roads. But I must say that people just need to SLOW down! The roads are pretty clear, but every now and then, 2 lanes narrows down to about 1 1/2 lanes. There really is no need to fly like a bat out of hell and put everyone on the roads at risk for an accident! Fortunately I don't have any reason to go into Pittsburgh because everyone and their brother was bitching about the road conditions in the city.

As there is another snow storm headed this way, we went to the Big Bird (our local grocery store which is really called Giant Eagle) tonight for bread and milk. I don't know what it is like in other parts of the country, but in the Burgh, when there is snow coming, you go get your bread, milk, and toilet paper whether you need it or not!

Tomorrow will be a super fun day because I will be attending our 2010 company kick-off. Oh they are pulling out all the stops on this one - the Asylum is having an all out affair at the Doubletree hotel to celebrate 2010. They were so sure we would all flock to this meeting that it is mandatory. I am sure I will have lots of fun things to vent about tomorrow.

The 7 words You Can't Say on TV

2010-02-05T04:04:00.000-08:00

The Enginerd recently hung some shelves for me in my craft room. He gets out the level, the stud finder, all the tools. He is really very handy, so I can trust that these shelve will never come down. One thing I have noticed about the Enginerd is that whenever he is building something, or doing anything with tools, the quality of his language declines and its like listening to George Carlin spout all of the words that cannot be said on TV.

The Enginerd definitely has his little chain of words when he is using tools - it goes something like this jesus- christ-a fuckin-son-of-a-bitch. When he gets really aggrevated, he throws in a little C-U-Next-Tuesday. It is actually really very funny because typically he doesn't swear alot. I swear alot. In fact my son told me that if there was a contest in the third grade for whose Mom swears the most, I would win hands down!

Shift gears - we were at Disney a few years ago, and honestly it was the most awful trip. The lines were long, 3 rides broke down (one while we were sitting on it). The kids really did not enjoy it, and we won't go back. In the middle of all of the frustration at Disney, I can't remember the exact context of the quote, but my adorable 4-year old little blonde blue eyed angel said,"jesus-christ-a-fuckin-a-rich". I looked straight at the Enginerd! There was no denying it - she was definitely quoting him! Well it was one of those moments that you want to totally crack up, but you can't! K-Lo actually repeated this phrase a few times, when we finally told her she really can't say that in public.

As the Enginerd was hanging those shelves for me, and he was mumbling his swear rant, I thought of that moment at Disney and it cracked me up all over again. Fortunately I haven't heard K-Lo use that phrase again. Although now she is smart enough to not let me hear her say it.

My crazy prego sister...

2010-02-03T03:55:00.000-08:00

The minor surgery went well yesterday. The actual procedure took about 15 minutes, which was fine with me. The cyst was on the back of my head on the right side. My son was extremely disappointed that I didn't bring it home - I asked if I could have it, but the assistant said No.

While I was in surgery, my sister texted me, so the Enginerd responded to her and told her I was in surgery. Apparently I had forgotten to tell her that I was having this cyst removed. She is pregnant so of course she went nuts, freaking out. "Is it serious? Why didn't she tell me? How long is the recovery time? blah blah blah"

I am actually loving watching my sister slowly lose her marbles with this pregnancy. It has been very therapeutic for me seeing her slowly descend into insanity - and the kid isn't even here yet! ha ha! After my second child, I was a wreck, and my sister was quick to point it out. Well what goes around comes around, and this whole pregnancy experience for my sister has delighted me and the Enginerd!

Don't get me wrong, I am soooo excited about having a little nephew! I am equally excited that my sister will soon understand what it feels like to have no control anymore!

All of you Moms know what I am talking about. You first lose control of your own body. After I had my kids, I broke out in hives for several months, and my very thick naturally curly hair went straight and fell out in handfuls. Plus my skin is very inelastic - I have lots of stretch marks and... well you all know what I am talking about - I don't really need to get into those ugly details.

Your time is not your own. Everything starts to revolve around feedings and naps. Then you lose control over your sleeping habits. You no longer sleep through the night because there is activity all night long - first with those late feedings and then there is the teething.

You think you will control your new little bundle of joy, but really they are in control now. I have 2 very strong willed children (don't we all?). My son wore pajamas for an entire year every day - every day was Jammie Day for D-Ro. And there was a time when the little girl would only wear pink. How could I squash these attempts at individuality? I have bigger fish to fry than what they are wearing. In fact, at one time, K-Lo wore a pink wig everywhere we went - she loved that thing! ha ha!

I am sure you are reading this thinking, "what the heck did you expect?" Honestly, I was really stupid, and didn't know what to expect. And I suspect my sister is just as clueless. So all of these changes are really going to take a toll on her (and I secretly LOVE it). Once she just resigns herself to the fact that she is no longer the boss, she will be fine.

And she will realize that it is all worth it in the end! (I keep telling myself that, as I sit in the corner, rocking back and forth, and banging my head against the wall.)

I love this blogging thing!

2010-02-02T02:53:00.000-08:00

Hello everyone! I have to tell all of you that I am loving this blogging thing! And thank you THANK YOU for all of you wonderful kind comments!

Today, I am going to the hospital for a minor out-patient surgery. Seriously, I did everything I could to make this a major in-patient surgery but no such luck. I was so looking forward to some drugs to knock me out, and then more drugs to numb the pain, and then an overnight stay just to be sure everything was ok... I have a cyst on my head that has grown to the size of a walnut or so. After 25 years, I have decided to have it removed. It has really lost its purpose in life - when the kids were little I told them it was the eye on the back of my head and that was how I always knew what they were doing. But they stopped believing that some time ago.

On the bright side, my Mother-In-Law is coming over to get the kids up and on the school bus today. Can you see me doing my happy dance?? My husband and I are driving down to Pittsburgh for the surgery. I am actually looking forward to sitting in traffic! My normal commute time is about 15 minutes, which is definitely not enough time to let me unwind down before I get to work. Today will be a refreshing change.

Anyway, I wanted to give everyone something fun to look at today, and this is it:

This is the most fabulous, delicious dessert! My son and I recently made this together and it was absolute perfection! This was a recipe from Taste of Home magazine. I have removed the "nutritional" information.

Chocolate Cookie Cheesecake
Ingredients
1-1/2 cups cream-filled chocolate sandwich cookie crumbs (about 16 cookies)
3 tablespoons butter, melted
4 packages (8 ounces each) Kraft Philadelphia® - Cream Cheese, softened
1 cup sugar
1-1/2 cups semisweet chocolate chips, melted and cooled
3 teaspoons vanilla extract
4 eggs, lightly beaten
20 chocolate cream-filled chocolate sandwich cookies, coarsely chopped

Directions
In a small bowl, combine cookie crumbs and butter. Press onto the bottom of greased 9-in. springform pan. Refrigerate while preparing filling.

In a large bowl, beat cream cheese and sugar until smooth. Beat in chocolate and vanilla. Add eggs; beat on low speed just until combined. Fold in half of chopped cookies. Pour over crust. Sprinkle with remaining cookies. Place pan on a baking sheet.

Bake at 325° for 50-60 minutes or until center is almost set and top appears dull. Cool on a wire rack for 10 minutes. Carefully run a knife around edge of pan to loosen; cool 1 hour longer. Refrigerate overnight. Yield: 12 servings.

Chocolate Cookie Cheesecake published in Taste of Home February/March 2009, p54

Manic Monday

2010-02-01T06:35:00.000-08:00

Now for the real reason I started this blog - to vent my frustrations and rant about whatever I feel like in an attempt to stop screaming at everyone all the time.

We all had a good weekend at my house; everyone got along; played some Beatles Guitar Hero; visited a friend; worked on a project for my sister (details about that in a future post); out for a quick bite last night; shaved the boys heads; all-in-all a good weekend.

Then Monday morning hits - Satan and Lucifer woke up and Lucifer is a complete bear! These are code names for my lovely children D-Ro and K-Lo. I swear I do not know what I am going to do with that girl once she hits puberty - her emotions are all over the place now and she is only 7! You know that little nursery rhyme, "there was a little girl who had a little curl right in the middle of her forehead. And when she was good, she was very very good. And when she was bad, she was HORRID!". Other than the curl, this little diddy describes K-Lo perfectly. She can be the sweetest most delightful child. However, when she is in a bad mood, look out.

I had just gotten out of the shower, when I heard a high pitched scream and then crying. K-Lo had bitten D-Ro! WHAT?!?!?!?! Oh My Goodness! She is 7 for heavens sake! Why is she biting? I have no idea, I thought we had nipped that in the bud when she was 2.

I do not spank the children, not because I am morally opposed mind you. I just do not hit them hard enough (according to the Enginerd). It really doesn't do anything when I try to spank. Please don't leave comments telling me how wrong spanking is - I don't agree, I won't agree- and if I could make it work, I would certainly do it. But I would much rather scream - I know I know - screaming is no better - whatever! It makes ME feel better - back to the reason I started this blog.

Anyway, D-Ro has quite a bruise where K-Lo bit him. I was absolutely furious. So furious I couldn't even scream (now that is mad!) After I bit K-Lo back (hey it worked when she was 2), I sent her to her room, and told her that she is now grounded for the week. GULP! No TV, no computer, no leaving her bedroom... This is going to be the worst week of my life! I told her she needs to find a better outlet for her anger and frustration - like writing in a diary or starting a blog.

Of course, K-Lo wanted "the week" defined more clearly, "does that include next Saturday and Sunday?" she asked. GRRR!

Please think of me this week. Please send happy and encouraging thoughts my way. I just increased my meds, and I simply cannot go back to the doctor so soon requesting another dosage increase!

Is God a boy or a girl?

2010-01-29T03:36:00.000-08:00

Warning: This post contains "religious" content. Please don't keep reading if you are easily offended regarding this subject.

Is God a boy or a girl? Why am I asking this question? I am not. However, my 7-year-old daughter is asking this question. Ugh! Where does she get this stuff? And she never asks her Dad any of these kinds of questions.

A bit of background... We moved back to Pittsburgh about 3 years ago after a 10 year hiatus in Ohio. While in Ohio, I belonged to a Lutheran Church and attended regularly. Like any good self respecting Lutheran, I knew that if I did not go to church, and blindly follow, I would be condemned to Hell. When my children came along, they were immediately baptized to preserve their innocent souls. I wasn't able to attend church as much, but as soon as they were old enough, I started taking them to Sunday School. At some point, I became the Sunday School teacher for the pre-schoolers. People that know me find that to be extremely funny! But we had fun, and teaching Sunday School kept me involved in the church, which I enjoyed.

Then we moved. I researched all of the Lutheran churches in the area - we weren't going to skip a beat. I had such good intentions. Well, you know that old saying "the road to Hell is paved with good intentions." We have not attended church at all since the move. Of course my Mother is not pleased about this - I am going straight to Hell and I am taking the kids with me. In spite of the fact that we don't attend church, we talk about God and religion; we pray before bed; my daughter leads a prayer before meals, when we are actually all sitting around the table together. Anyway to make a long story longer, God and religion are not a foreign subject in our home.

All of that being said, I was in no way prepared for my daughter to ask me if God is a boy or a girl. This is not something that I have ever thought of before. Lutherans do not ask these types of questions - we just follow! How do I even answer this? So I decided to try to lead her to her own answer.

K-Lo: Is God a boy or a girl?

Me: What do you think?

K-Lo: I don't know.

Me: Well, think all of the trees and the people and the animals. Pretty complicated don't you think?

K-Lo: oh yes!

Me: You know lots of boys including Daddy and D-Ro, do you think any of them could have figured out how to make all of this stuff work?

K-Lo: No Way!

So my very bright little girl figured it out all on her own - God must be a girl! Ha ha! I just love that kid!

It's Cleaning Day

2010-01-28T03:58:00.000-08:00

Well, today is cleaning day at our house. Actually today is the day the cleaning ladies come, which means we spent the evening cleaning the house last night. That may sound funny to some of you, but we need to red up (Pittsburghese for "straighten up") before the cleaning ladies come so that they can actually clean.

The Enginerd took D-Ro took hockey last night, so K-Lo and I were in charge of cleaning up. All-in-all it isn't too difficult, we really just need to de-clutter. We were upstairs, and while I was straightening up one room, K-Lo was picking up clothes and putting them down the chute. She came in to tell me that she had found a great use for a spare hockey stick. What might that be? She was jamming clothes down the laundry chute with it! Ugh! Sure enough - she plugged up the laundry chute!

While she was unplugging the chute, I was in D-Ro's room trying to figure out where to start. Please do not post comments telling me that I should make him clean his own room! I am not an idiot - I know that, but desperate times call for desperate measures! The messiest person in our house is D-Ro - he is a little piggy! He has a huge bedroom, and most of the time there is a path from his door to his bed.

A few months ago, I bought him a key chain that made all kinds of farting sounds. Yes - you read that correctly - D-Ro has an obsession with disgusting body sounds (like most little boys), and so I made his day and bought him a keychain that made a variety of these sounds. I think he actually nominated me for Mommy of the Year that day! Anyway, that little device has been hiding somewhere around his chest of drawers, and every now and then, it would just go off for no apparent reason - this has been going on for about 2 months now. For instance, one night, I was tucking him in bed, and that little device ripped one. As I was cleaning up his room, it starting tooting - over and over. It was no longer random, so I pulled the area around the dresser apart, and found the little sucker. It won't be bothering us anymore.

As I ripped it apart, I wondered to myself what the cleaning ladies thought the first time that thing went off when they were in his room. Ha ha!

My first blog post...

2010-01-27T11:38:00.000-08:00

Well, I am taking the plunge. I have decided to start this blog to write about the craziness that is my life. So a little background, I am a 40-something happily married Mom to D-Ro and K-Lo. My husband, the Enginerd was my high school sweetheart. We have been married for almost 17 years. D-Ro is our 8-year son who is just a mini version of the Enginerd. K-Lo is our 7-year old daughter who has the attitude of a teenager as well as her mother's sharp tongue,

I am an Engineering Project Manager which basically means that I get paid to be a bitch, at least that is what the Enginerd would tell you. He and I previously worked together for several years, so he often witnessed my interactions with our other engineering co-workers. Currently, I work for a high-tech software/hardware company, which I will refer to as the asylum. I imagine that there will often be characters from the asylum that make their way into my ramblings. I am convinced that the writer of Dilbert works somewhere in my building, though I have yet to find him.